Evorama

OOPS.....

2011-07-10T15:50:00.001-07:00

So....it's been a few minutes since I've blogged. Oops. I think I got sidetracked. I really thought about giving up all together for a minute, but realized my last post to be forever imprinted on everyone's memory would be about pooping. Is that what I want to be remembered for??

Maybe, a little. But first remember for my amazing, smelly, good-looking family as pictured above. Our little dude is getting CUTER. How is it that he came from... me?! No one will ever know.

We've also been a very, very busy Heaton household. Here a few things you missed:

One, we moved. We live in a HOUSE! I LOVE IT!! I can go number two in three different toilets!

Two, our first vacation since BEFORE Carter. Jake and I went to Vegas, baby, with our friends where we were the classiest people to ever meet Dick Butkus. True story. I also sinned and won 100 sin-ful dollars off of one dollar in a slot machine. I bought pancakes.

THREE - Back to school. I'm in both UVU and USU for all the pre-requisites for USU's school counseling masters program. Ahh, scary. Jake made me do it.

FOUR - Dude is getting so funny. He is talking now and his favorites words consist of 'poop', 'bum', 'turtle' and 'spandex.' WHERE did he get these from?!!

FIVE - Jake now drives a Harley. Saddest story in the world. I plan to make him repent of his evil Harley ways. I would prefer he drive a segway.

SIX - I turned... gulp... twenty-nine. It will be the last birthday I will EVER have. Twenty-nine forever, baby.

SEVEN - Nothing else, but this is my favorite number.

So if anyone is even left that happens to come across this blog, I promise to get back into blogging and talk less about poop. But I probably just lied about the poop part.

Pooping Sounds

2011-01-09T15:57:00.000-08:00

Okay, you crazy three ladies that still read my blog...or just stare at it because you've lost your minds AND your pants.... we've been busy here at the Heatons.

We had an awesome Christmas with a sometimes-Satanic-little child. He went a little crazy.

Carter has gotten even more crazy with all his toddler shennanigans. When he isn't busy drinking toilet water (yep, still obsessed with that thing), throwing balls at our heads, unlocking the front door and running half naked outside (or is that Jake?), screaming 'HAYY DUDE!!!', he is pooping. He has started his own cult... of pooping sounds. Geez, people, what is wrong with boys and all this number two business? I swear the kid goes 18 times per day.

He has been eating us out of house and home and we go through several thousand diapers per week. Good thing Jake got a new job after his company closed in November. We can afford more diapers....and tranquilizer... I mean... vegetables.
Oh yeah. And before all that happened, Carter turned one. He even had an awesome Pirate Party that I never posted about. Must be all that tranquilizer.... I mean...vegetables.

Things are luckily looking a LOT better this rocking 2011. Jake starts an awesome new position tomorrow, I'm back in school with my Justin Bieber notebook, I love my job, I love my boys, I love my friends, I love deodorant...and I've got a poopy diaper to change.

Forts Rule

2010-12-08T12:43:00.000-08:00

It's been a hard, hard month. So, in the interest of all things happy, I am here to post something astounding, thought-provoking, and inspirational.

Forts rule. Boys drool.

Happy December Everybody!

Face Leprosy

2010-11-03T12:20:00.000-07:00

So I know I’m way behind on pictures. Couldn’t help but post this one to keep you all guessing, and peeing in your pants for those yet to come.Hope you all had a Happy Halloween. The ninja Chuck Norris and his little monkey sure did have a good one.

I wore this to work. No one could figure out what I was. (Chuck Norris is too awesome for human vision). A guy walked in and asked our secretary, “What is wrong with that ladies’ face?”

Yeah.

Bowl head.

2010-10-22T12:42:00.001-07:00

There are many, many things that I am bad at.
Blogging, for instance.
My list of crappiness also includes walking and chewing gum at the same time, mothering (Worst Mother of BRHS Class 0f 2000 – Holla!), cutting straight with scissors, having a face that doesn't make babies cry, being nice to homeless people….. I could go on for hours.
But, there are a few things I deserve a shout out for, for being the Captain of Awesomeness.
One thing: my thrifty skills. I have taught bubba dude to play with garbage in order to save money. His favorite toy? The one he can’t go to bed without? His bowl I stole from someone in college. Pretty much 90% of the day, it’s on his head. It kind of acts as a helmet which is much needed because I also am bad at walking without falling over, which he has inherited.

The other thing I am good at? Well, pretty much nothing else. BUT, I am posting an awesome picture of a friend get-together, because THEY are all awesome. I know I am just there for people to kick for entertainment, but still. Love you guys. A Special shout out to my BFF Oprah for making an appearance.
Also, I am never eating sushi again. Or Cheez Whiz.

Old ladies rule

2010-09-10T13:28:00.000-07:00

This cutest face says it all. 'Some days everything tastes like a turd, but I'm so sexy!!'
I know I feel like I've been thrown into the blender of life, with a zucchini. Nasty zucchini. Blech. UNTIL it is made into bread. And then it's good. (See, that's a deep metaphor. Read it again and then hang it on your fridge).
We've had chaos surround us in the Heaton household as of late, although I'm sure it's muss less chaotic then the trials the rest of you deal with.
We've had a lousy, busy, insane week and this morning I just decided to call in sick.... because I AM sick. No, really. The chaos made me go all sicky. So as I'm laying here in my 'sick pants' (do the rest of you have those or is it another weird 'Ev' thing?) I am thinking I am not slowing down enough amidst the chaos to truly enjoy so many of the blessings of this life.
Especially the baby awesome. Old ladies are always so right, that he grows too fast to even know. He is 10 months...almost 11. He is freaking WALKING (well, like 5 steps and then freaks out and canon-ball dives). He's talking (he says 'yaaaay). And he's TEETHING. Which is the crap thing of it ALL. Perfect little sleeper? Not any more.
Earlier this day, while still in my sick pants, I was watching baby tv shows. Where is my BAAAA-BY? WAAHH!!!
So here's to trying to enjoy the little things, the teething sleepless nights, and to celebrating his growth. Soon, he might be old enough to be enlisted as my slave, so at least THAT is something that is good about growing up.

No really, today I'm overly grateful for this little miracle of mine. And for my life. I truly haven't felt this happy, albeit a little stressed, before. I love my boy, I love having my BFF sisters and nephew so close to torture every day, I love my little cheese of a husband, I love my job, I love my baby-sitter, and I love being able to see my toes again. So sick pants, or no pants, I'm having a good day.

Individually wrapped cheese

2010-08-22T22:13:00.001-07:00

So my BFF Oprah convinced me not to quit blogging, along with all you sweet friends who made comments. She really likes my stories about poop. Oh, that Oprah.

It's 11:15 on a Sunday night and I can't sleep. I have to admit, I'm a little 'high' and I should be chaperoned. I don't know if I've mentioned this before, but I do NOT have a high tolerance for pain killers. And not the illegal kind, even. A couple Tylenol and Ibuprofen are good enough to have me table dancing. We don't even want to talk about my days in the hospital with morphene or the days of the prescription Oxy where I mooned half the neighborhood.
So I have another migraine and popped a few Tylenol and now everything is looking like rainbows and sparkles.
And did you KNOW that they sell individually wrapped packages of cheddar cheese, like little gifts from angels? THEY ARE THE BEST THING EVER!!!! I've eaten four!!!

Last time this pain-killer legal high happened was a few weeks ago. I was on my way to choir with Jack-Jack and Ash and I let them know about the days when I wore pudding balloons.

So I will tell the world now of my secret. We just had our 10 year reunion (oh my freaking gosh!!) which has got me all sorts of reminiscing. 10 years ago I was still pretty insane but my parents didn't let me out of my cage much so not many people knew. Plus I cared about what everybody thought. Always. Now.... whether it's the drugs or the head injury or schizophrenia, I don't. I don't even have a filter and it gets me in trouble.
What was I talking about?
Oh yeah. Pudding balloons. I was taught by an older and much wiser friend that pudding is as good as silicone. So I learned to fill balloons with pudding (vanilla is the best, least smelly option) and flatten them out and add them to my brasiere. And I did it. ALL THE TIME.
They exploded a few times, but they made for a tasty snack in the midst of embarrassment.

And also, I wore two bras on my wedding day.

Crap, my blog isn't private yet. But those are my stories and I couldn't sleep until I shared them. Oh, seriously, this cheese is the best thing EVER.

To quit....and Duck Fuzz

2010-08-03T20:32:00.001-07:00

Yeah, so I have been seriously contemplating quitting blogging. But first, I just have to show you one of my favorite things: Carter's freaking cute duck fuzz of a head. Lookit!!!

I love this kid!!

ANYWAYS...... the quitting thing.... Yeah. I don't know. I love to stalk..... I mean, to look at other people's blogs. I am amazed at my friends. You have so many talents and abilities and funny stories and are all so near to perfect I shake just thinking about it. Me? I talk about poop. And homeless people. I am SO not a wonder mother that can post about the amazing projects of my day. My life is crazy busy and full of shenninagans, but not blog-worthy ones. Honestly, I do have a confession - I have never made a casserole in my ENTIRE life. EVER. (Also never watched Star Wars so I STILL think I'm cool). I wonder if my random rants and ravings are worth the time, or if I should just stalk in peace.

Besides, why do all these Chinese people want to leave weird Chinese comments? Do you think they're death threats.... or recipes??!! Go private??

Sigh. These are my thoughts. Maybe the real reason for maybe quitting is that I can't find my computer pluggy thing for my camera and I'm too lazy to get pictures other ways. Geez.

Chapstick.... Cuz my lips hurt real bad

2010-06-17T11:54:00.000-07:00

Item of business #1: I know I have been ooooober bad about blogging. But I have ooooober good excuses, which I will include.

Item #2: The title of this post has no relevance. I get sick of having to think of good titles. And because it's my birthday today, I get to write what I want.

So.... here's a little bit of what we've been up to. And if you want pictures, give up now, because I get to be lazy on my birthday and I don't want to find my camera.

*Carter is crawling. Everywhere. And not just crawling. He is pulling himself up on everything... EVERYTHING. I'm worried social services will be called because he keeps falling over and banging himself.
*He has a fascination with the toilet. Should I be worried? Every time I leave a room, I hear his pitter-patter as he follows me. When it goes silent, I find him in the bathroom... sucking on the toilet. Our toilets have never been so clean.
*Jake started a kick-a new job. We have been praying and interviewing and crying for months, and we feel so so so blessed. He is the manager/designer of a marketing firm in Cottonwood Heights. Go Jake!
*Jake also thought it would be awesome to go and tear up half of his ACL and meniscus and had surgery. He is really funny when he is high. He talks about poop. More than me.
*I am going back to work. It's a necessity thing, but I think it will be ok - it's only part time. I will be working at UVU as the graduation/transfer adviser. Or something like that.... I'm too old, because of my birthday, to remember what the job actually is. But it's only from 12-5 so I can corrupt Carter with the rest of my days. I think it will be a good thing... I am just having anxiety about having to leave my widdle baby boy. However, I hope it will help my social retardedness that I am getting from spending most days babbling Lady Gaga lines to my baby awesome.
*I am joining an awesome new choir, the Millennium Choir out of SLC. I haven't sung since college and I ooooober miss it and I hope it will be a good thing. If they can handle all my talk about poop.
*I have taken up Zumba. Best workout ever. I basically don't get the hip action/jiggling thing, because I am wa-hite as all white, but I"m good at making up my own dances. And I'm losing a lot of my jiggly parts!!
*We went on our first vacation ever as a family to St. George for the sealing/blessing of my beautiful favorite niece Lydia. Carter doesn't sleep in hotels. And he REALLY likes their toilets.

These are my thoughts for the day. Now I am going to eat 6 pounds of M&M's, because I can. Besides, I'm starting to lose control of my bowels in my old age so I better enjoy it while I can.

Brain, how I MISS YOU

2010-05-05T10:28:00.001-07:00

Ok, so I always have to start off most posts with ravings of my awesome little man. Because that's what makes me happy, and that's what I want to blog about......
My amazing sister Becca happens to hold the world record of neck circumference, but is also amazingly beautiful and talented. (Check out her blog... rdlphoto.blogspot.com. AMAZING)

His 6 month stats:
Weight: 18 pounds. He hasn't hardly gained any in 2 months. That's because he has a diagnosed case of the wiggles, the shakies, the oober-hyperactive-shake-what-your-mama-gave you squirmies. This kid is a mover. He is SO close to crawling that it scares me. I love that he sits, but it's not good enough for him. He wants to MOVE. He spends all day rolling around the house and scooting on his belly and bum, and I keep finding him stuck in corners. Oh, geez.
Height: 29.5 inches. Off the charts. Gonna be a baller.
Head: too big to count. Measuring tapes don't get that big.
He is NOT an eater. We have been trying to go through all the fruits and veggies and he pretty much only eats carrots, peaches, and apples. He LOVES to giggle and has a the cutest darned belly laugh I've ever heard. He still mellow, and always happy, but SO curious. He loves people and part of the reason he will never eat is that he hates to sit still for the few minutes it takes. He would much rather flirt. Oh, yeah, that's right... I'm already getting ready for when this dude is a teenager. Women of the world, crawl under your beds, because Mama Ev will be ON.

He also is 100% his dad. Yeah, he has some hope. He thinks he is a bad-a but underneath is all gooshy.
Priceless face, eh??!! I LOVE IT!!! And I love that the little blondey has grown the five hairs necessary for a fo-hawk.

I, on the not-so-cute hand, also have a diagnosed medical condition. Mom-brain. Can't remember if I already posted about this or not, because I don't remember anything.
I showed up early to a birthday party ---- 2 days early.
I shaved the back of my husband's head completely bald. He has one sad, lone strip of baldness ... reverse mohawk. No joke.
I wore my pants backwards to the grocery store.
I tried to get ready for church on a Friday morning.

It's not a joke. I've lost it. Ah, oh well. Backwards pants might be the NEW thing.

Grunt

2010-04-12T12:38:00.000-07:00

Whew, long time no see... I'm sure all the Chinese people leaving comments on my blog have missed me.... (time to go private????) Like everybody else... we've been a little busy. Mostly busy being in love with the above posted handsome he-devil ninja. What a jolly, drooly, happy, genius boy. I love my life.

We also... moved. Yeah. It was pretty sudden. We have moved 6 times in our 5 years of marriage, own 2 of the homes... and now live in a condo. Not everything is as planned but it works. I will do whatever it takes to try and stay home with my baby. If we could just get someone to buy one of our houses then I wouldn't have to listen to the upstairs neighbor vacuum, seriously, twice a day. ( I'm a failure if that is how much you are supposed to vacuum. Or maybe she just leaves a lot of crumbs, or is into vacuum yoga...do any of YOU vacuum twice a day?? Seriously??).

We moved from good ole Pleasant Grove, BYU-driven, non-caffeine drinking, mom-haircut, land to Saratoga Springs, about 15 minutes further out. Our lease was up and we just needed a little more space, and we found a brand new, nicer, big placer that was less than what we were paying. We also needed to feel a little less Utah County-ish. Like I've said before, we decorated Carter's nursery in skulls ... we do not fit the mold. No offense intended. Here's to hoping Saratoga won't shun us for having mohawks, facial hair (my dang 5 o'clock shadow), or for our motorcycle.

Also in the meantime, I have lost my little baby. Cry. He is a little man. He eats solid foods, loves carrots, sits UP, and now thinks he can learn to crawl. He giggles, does the bobble-head, makes monkey faces, blows spit, and just generally makes life worth living. He turns 6 months next week. Yeah. It's a good life.

I love my Barbie arm

2010-03-09T08:45:00.001-08:00

So I have to be honest. I've had work done. I'm not all natural. I've been under the knife.
Yeah, I'm a multi-thousand dollar woman. I'm half titanium.

I remember one of the first things I remember after coming into consciousness out of the ICU after my accident was my bishop visiting. While under the heavy influence of morphine, I told him I was in the hospital for a boob job. I even made hand motions depicting boobs. My mom has never turned so red, or so I'm told.

So maybe being metal isn't as cool as a boob job, but it's not so bad. I've always felt I'm a little different, and now I have the X-Rays to prove it.
My right arm no longer straightens. It has since been labeled the Barbie arm... I spent a few years being so ashamed of it I couldn't wear short sleeved shirts. Now, I love it. It's a miracle arm - the nerve damage sustained was so severe, it was paralyzed for several months. One day... it just worked again, and has been working ever since.
Until recently, when a screw decided to come so loose that I can hang coats on it. I tried to ignore it for a few months, but it has gotten so bad I hear it jiggling. So next week I get to literally have a screw come out. And I'm FREAKING out. This is the fifth surgery the accident has caused me, and I keep having those nightmares that I'm like those patients on Grey's Anatomy that die on the table before the surgery even starts.
I'm scared. Skeered, as the homies put it. I don't want next week to come! I know I'm being a big baby... but it's so creepy that I get a screwdriver to the arm...

And because every post has to include some news of my baby awesome ninja, here you go.
He had his 4 month check up two weeks ago. He is 28" long. He's a giant - off the charts. His weight was 16 pounds, which is only in the 70th percentile. The doctor said he was long and skinny.
DOES THIS LOOK SKINNY TO YOU??!!

He has also started to eat rice cereal. Well.... smear it up his nose and ears and eyes is more like it, because he can't figure out a spoon.. .but still, I can't believe he's this old.
He has also been doing such cute things. He has figured out how to roll BOTH ways, and all day long rolls around the room and under furniture. He grabs everything he can find and puts it in his mouth. He makes monkey faces and spit bubbles and giggles non-stop.
I LOVE MY LITTLE MAN. And his million little faces.
I've gotta get the Barbie arm fixed so as to better snuggle this little ball of awesome cuteness. Sigh.

Stop Growing Up I say!!!

2010-02-12T12:56:00.000-08:00

Scream!!! I've come to many realizations during the past few weeks. Here are some of them.

1. I am clinically insane and should be caged. Wait... don't I mention this in every post? Part of the insanity (that and the drooling).

2. I really, really love my job as a mom..... although I think my son is re-thinking his choice to stand in my line in heaven... but I think I've posted that before too.

3. We spend our entire lives wanting to be older, until we're OLD, and then we wish everything would just SLOW DOWN!!!

My piddley little newborn baby boy is piddley no longer. He is CHUNKA. 'BUBBA THE CHUBBA.' Squishy everywhere. He went to the doctor this week and is already 16 pounds. I feed him nachos on the side, but don't tell.

The kid never ceases to amaze me. He is just so happy to be alive and explore the world around him. One thing is for sure and he is a friggin wiggler! He will NOT stay still. He likes to stand (with help of course), sit up, roll over, crabwalk.... you name it. He is just 3 months and he has learned to scoot. Not kidding. He pivots constantly on the ground and never stays in the same place that we put him down. I told you before... he really is a Ninja that WILL give Mr. Norris a run for his money. Prepare for Carter, Utah Ranger.

Realization 4: The Bumbo is my best friend. I never even heard of these things until my friend Di mentioned it. It sits him up so I don't have to. Now I have two hands free to... eat, pick my nose, and whatever I want!

Realization 5: He might be growing up fast... but it can only get better. We love him more every day and I always look forward to what he learns next!
Oh, and I realized I just ate an entire bag of Reeses. Oh, poop.

Bootie-licious

2010-01-22T14:20:00.000-08:00

Is anybody else so over January? I mean, I love the snow, but by now, the holidays are over, the snowmen have been built, the fudge has been eaten, and I just wanna freaking skip around in flowers and see some gosh dang sunlight. Is that too much to ask?

We have spent a lot of snuggly days at home..., because we don't get out... we are down to one car these days and since hitch-hiking in Utah County is a little creepy, Carter and I are stranded until the truck is fixed. Not too bad, considering how cute and happy this little chubbers is.

In this free time I have decided to do many free things. Number one, I am being shredded by Jillian Michaels. It has been such an accomplishment to step on the scale and see the very slowly falling numbers, but at least they're falling. At least I am fitting into my jeans... although it's frustrating when after I work out, dripping from sweat, the husband says, while eating his Oreos, 'Oh, I decided to cough and lost 86 pounds.'

On those days, I make cakes. Yeah, I have decided to one-up Betty Crocker. She wishes she were me. Check out this baby; I should go into friggin business!
Yeah, so I guess cakes, or Betty Crocker-ing is not my thing. I really am trying to learn to be domestic after so many years working out of the home.... but I guess I have to take my baby steps.

Speaking of baby steps... and babies... I know, I know, I am SUCH a mom with a mom haircut, but I can never get over how blessed I am to have baby awesome. Baby awesome is three months this week! He sure lives up to his name. Not only has he been sleeping through the night for several weeks, but it is usually 9-10 hours at a time. He is nothing but giggles and talking these days, and he even wakes up from his little naps just playing and talking to his crib. He has already rolled over and is such a little river-dancer.

I can't get over this little miracle and what an angel he is to us. What a mellow, happy, but freaking fat and adorable guy! I know for sure he will change his angel ways the minute he starts being mobile, so I better enjoy these snuggly days while they last. All the old people are right again, it really goes by too fast.

Oh yeah, and he is sporting a pretty wicked awesome mullet. Business in the front, par-tay in the back.
Also, he has back fat. But he's bringing sexy back.

Sike!!!

2010-01-06T13:07:00.000-08:00

To say 2009 was a hard year would be a bit of an understatement. It was literally the best and worst year of our little family's life.

We've had a lot of the rough stuff try to re-surface lately, and yesterday I found myself all friggin out crazy again. Not my normal, lick people's faces crazy, but the kind of crazy where I cry when I saw how skinny people eating hamburgers are on TV (THAT IS NOT REALISTIC), and cry when I saw the pile of dishes, and cry when my new dryer sheets didn't smell spring fresh, and more like an old lady's perfume.

I found myself in the 'WHY ME??!!' mode and called most of my family to complain about how it sucks so much to be an adult.

But then it hit me. Thanks to a much wiser sister Becca.

I am seriously, like, so blessed. Seriously.

So we lost two jobs this year. We were able to get two more jobs.

We were told last December that we would never be able to conceive.... three months later, sha-pow!

We were told Carter would come two months early and face major problems. He came on time - perfect, healthy, and totally ninja awesome. He is the happiest little chubbers I have EVER seen.

So my body was taken over by something that looks weird and I had to gain weight - the bed rest worked and I am healthy (lost 36 pounds and counting, sha-zam yo!).

So we lost health insurance at 7 months prego. We got it back with 3 weeks to spare.

These small miracles are no small thing. I know we are being looked after from a power so much greater than our own, and I have NO room to complain. I remember 6 years ago when all I could do is pray to be out of the wheelchair and walk again. I promised myself then I wouldn't sweat the small things. I want to smack myself for thinking things are that tough now.

I guess I had to post this as a reminder to myself to remember to cherish the blessings and forget about the other crap daily life brings. Seriously. I know, it's deep.

I mean, look at my sweetheart's smile. Somehow... looking at this... I love my life!

Yeah, and the moving thing? Not going to happen anymore. I will be in Utah County. Please give me a HOLLA if you are around because I seriously am worried I might start wearing velour tracksuits before it's too late.

Poo. And Christmas.

2009-12-26T18:44:00.001-08:00

Hey, did you know that Chuck Norris doesn't believe in Germany?

Anyways.... all I wanted for Christmas was a little miracle. This is what I got.

Yeah, pretty much the most kick-A awesome miracle ever. It makes me the happiest I have EVER, EVER been.

*As a side note, Carter decided to throw a curve ball at mom and started sleeping through the night last week. Still not every night, but SO much better. We now have a pretty good routine/schedule going which makes for much happier Heatons. Thank you all you mamas for your input. SO helpful.*

Christmas, again, was SUPER. I mean, really really SUPER, and even rad. But full of poo. Carter routinely poos all the way to his chin. And armpits. And sometimes ears. We go through about 7 outfit changes a day. I feel like poo is a constant on the brain. We went to Jake's work party, and as the other young couples sat around talking about their jobs and politics, I liked to routinely add in facts about bowel movements; their colors and frequencies. Yeah. Will Mom brain ever go away? I seriously put both my shoes on the wrong feet the other day and walked around for a half hour. Couldn't figure out why they were hurting my feet.

Christmas also brought about many new stressors and urps. (That's like vomit. Cuz life throws up on us too). Turns out there is an 87% we will be moving.... AGAIN. Utah County must be kicking us out because I say poo too much.

So... point of this post? Can't remember. And sounds like Carter just made a poo. Hee.

Aw, geez, mom.

2009-12-04T14:17:00.000-08:00

I have 100% mom brain. Before I had Carter I told myself that although being a mother is the greatest thing to ever do, I did not want to lose my self in it. But I am one step away from mom jeans and sequin cat soccer sweaters. My only conversations consist of size and consistency of poop, boob juice, and naps. But I wouldn't have it any other way.

I truly now know the meaning of not having enough hours in the day. I am so lucky to be able to stay home, but I am in complete amazement of how others have more than one child. I am surrounded by mountains of laundry, dirty dishes, messy bedrooms... I consider it an accomplishment to get showered by 2 p.m. But my kid is thriving. Or at least pretending, because he is pretty much an undercover ninja. I try to look at his face, and look at the kid... he is chubbing up like no one has chubbed, and he is the most mellow, happy kid I have ever met. I mean, look at this face! So does this mean I am doing something right??

His favorite thing to do lately, along with smiling and even a few giggles, is to give me the look of "Aw geez, mom, you're an embarrassment to humanity." Tru dat, yo.

So I have some venting/questioning/ranting for all of you mothers out there. I really feel like a failure! I thought this would be easier. I have a degree in human development and thought that would give me an edge up. Ha. That is funny.

I am having the hardest time with continued sleep deprivation. Carter has made it to where he will sleep 3-4 hours a time at night, but that's it. Other friends have babies this age and have them sleeping way more. Many have them on schedules.

Should he be on a schedule at six weeks? Should I just roll with his punches? Every day he treats my boobs as a snack bar and won't eat for longer than 10 minutes. I feel guilty because I don't know how much I should be playing with him, how long I should let him cry.... why isn't there a better instruction book out there?

I feel like I am doing things wrong because all day he won't take longer than 20 minute naps and wants to eat every hour and a half or so. Yeah. My boobs hurt. Just so you know, because I knew you wondered.

And will I EVER get more than 2 hours sleep?? Yeah, help.

Happy One Month!

2009-11-17T13:48:00.000-08:00

Happy One MONTH Birthday, Carter!!!

I guess I don't mean to brag, (OK, I really do), but my son is already a superhero by the age of 4 weeks. Here are some of the many, many reasons.

*His most amazing cuteness, handsomeness, and overall good-lookingness is enough to melt anybody in their tracks; especially grandmas.

*He sleeps with one eye half open. He knows when the enemy is coming.

*He speaks one billion languages, and especially those of zoo animals. When he falls asleep, he lets out little squeaks like a dolphin. In the middle of his sleep, he grunts and groans like a little goat. When he is ready to eat, he is an all out snorting pig. Very cute.

*He can lift his head and chest all the way up while on his tummy. Flying comes next.

*When he is awake, he just sits quietly and entertains himself for hours. He is secretly contemplating the plan on saving the world.

*He has the world's largest superhero tummy and could fit a station wagon inside. This kid packs it away like I've never seen. And he very politely burps when done. He even has Manners.

*He has killer gas. Whew.

*Even though he is so manly and tough, he loves nothing more than to curl into a little ball and snuggle on his mommy's chest. He's such a little cuddler. Of super proportions, of course.

*He has already giggled once. One might argue it was a sort of gas/hiccup/grunt, but it was an all out giggle, with dimples and everything. He has a very silly mommy, and he knows it.

*His mommy doesn't know what she's doing, but he continues to thrive and survive. If that's not a superhero, I don't know what is.

Carter, we love you more than we can ever say. Never has something brought us such joy and we thank God each day for the beautiful, perfect little miracle that you are. Happy One Month.

Even Ninjas need to rest....

2009-11-08T16:45:00.000-08:00

I can't believe it has been 19 days. 19 days since my life flip-turned-upside-down (said like the Fresh Prince, yo). Look at my little guy! He is so tough and ninja that as you can see above, he even knocks himself around to prove how manly he is!

We have good days and bad days, but the worst thing is still sleep deprivation. It does wonders for a person who is as naturally crazy as me. Add that to painkillers... it's a daily circus. I have daily, even hourly breakdowns.... being a mother IS the hardest thing in the world. I am neurotic and anxious and scared....this is really, really, really hard.

I just have to say that the difficult pregnancy and labor gave me the biggest blessing ever, and Carter is a wonderful, happy, and pretty much easy baby. He hardly ever cries. He just snorts when he is hungry (which is ALL THE STINKING TIME). He tends to get a little pissed off when he is naked, because that is so un-awesome, but other than that, he is just curious, precious, and a hungry little pig. And I love him. As soon as he fixes the whole day/night mix up (he gets up every stinking hour at night!), we'll be good...

He keeps giving Jake and I looks (see above) like "Who the heck are you? I thought I was in Brangelina's line in heaven....." He also tends to squeak like a high-pitched dolphin, which some people might not perceive as manly, but I think it is a ninja warning call.
Yes, Cap'n CARRRRRRRRRRTER is still Captain Awesome.

Lovin my Burrito Boy!!

2009-10-27T18:35:00.000-07:00

My goodness gracious, Carter is already a week old. All those old people are right - it flies by way, way too fast.

So I thought I would share the story of his highness, the ultimate ninja, and his arrival.

Above is a picture of me from approximately 10 days ago. Yeah, I know. Illegally too large in 7 countries.

So a few days later I woke up not feeling the best. Monday night we had a friend over and we were watching Frankenstein. Well, I don't like monsters (they really smell). I guess Carter doesn't either because he chose in the middle of the movie to have my water break, out of the blue.

Jake didn't believe me and thought I'd peed my pants in scaredy-ness.

So a little over an hour later, at 8:30 p.m. we arrived at the hospital.

Wasn't dialating, at all, but almost fully effaced. They decided to start me on pitosin to speed up the contractions. Epidural? Heck, YES. Was great, for about 3 hours.

The contractions then started to cause Carter some distress. Never, ever have been so scared as when his heart rate dropped off the monitor and 5 nurses/doctors came running and kept mentioning a c-section. Got it figured out.

But then something bizarro-happened and the epidural wore completely off. I was not numb at all. The anesthesiologist said it was some kind of nerve blockage. (I think it was a conspiracy by a group of vampires but that's another story).

So I was dying in pain and kept yelling at everybody, calling them Satan. Finally at 5 a.m. I was ready to push.

Got to push for a freaking 3 hours because I had to rest in between contractions because of Carter's distress. I felt every bit of it. Let's just say that every woman that has given birth deserves a Purple Heart and one billion dollars, seriously.

When the doctor finally came in, I was ready. One horrible cut and three pushes later, he was out...8:30 a.m. I screamed like no one else has screamed, worse than a fat lady with her donuts forever taken away, but never have been so amazed at what I saw. Even being goopy, he was CUTE. I've had the fear all along that our poor baby would be a mixture of Chuck Norris' grandma and Donk, but he was beautiful.

He has been such a little miracle, angel of a baby. I know everybody says that, but I'd like to take a minute to join in the sappiness because it's totally true. I can't get over the miracle that he is, perfectly formed, down to his teeny little fingernails, here and healthy and beautiful.

He is all Jake. He has Jake's beautiful lips and little dimple in the chin, Jake's beautiful big blue eyes, Jake's huge noggin. He does have my fat cheeks and his mouth is so incredibly large it could almost fit a small puppy in there.

Recovery seems to be slow-going, and I am not one of those perfect women that is out running, wearing the skinny jeans, looking perfect, doing her own dishes.

But I am one of those women who is revelling in smelling her beautiful miracle boy, watching his funny facial expressions, listening to his squeak-squeakersons, and wrapping him up so he is my little burrito of a boy. Labor totally, totally sucks, and so does the aftermath (can I just say, POO?), but the end result already makes me forget it.

I am in love.

*Note* I have never fallen more in love with Jake than watching him be a daddy. He is INCREDIBLE. *

Sha-zam!!! He's HERE!

2009-10-22T20:19:00.001-07:00

So in case you didn't hear my screaming across state lines, he's here!

Carter Oren Heaton was born on Tuesday, October 20 at 8:29 a.m.

7 lbs, 13 0unces and 20 inches full of awesome good-looking-ness.

He is perfect and doing wonderful.

His mommy is so tired she can't tell the difference between a boob and a spatula, so more to come later with all the beautiful details and pics.

Seriously, though, isn't he amazing??!!!!

Get OUT!!

2009-10-14T12:46:00.000-07:00

So I don't get it. I fought going into early labor and contractions for two months straight. Now that I want baby awesome to BE here, he sticks his fanny all up in my ribs and is refusing to come out. No contractions - NOTHING.

I'm not due until next week but I already know he is at least 15 pounds and might have a full beard. I am ready. He needs to decide to be ready. Seriously.

The doctor had encouraging news - I am 80% effaced but still only dialated at about a 2. (Better than zero, right?) He stripped my membranes yesterday (AAARRRRRRRRRR) and I thought last night would be the night. But no. Ninja Norris has set up camp.

So I will post pictures of my half completed nursery. We are a bunch of rebel-rousers and wanted any excuse to use skulls instead of teddy bears so we went after pirates. None of the bedding or finishing touches are done yet, but this is what we have so far:

Our crib is awesome. Jake's mom got it for us and it makes me tear with joy looking at it!!
Aren't we good parents to have our baby ninja looking up into the face of a skull each morning?
I also continue to feel very blessed. I know I want him out but I am truly grateful he stayed in long enough to be healthy. I just want to give birth to a baby and not a MAN. We have been blessed as well by having such kick-a awesome friends and family. We had several amazing, generous showers and I don't know where we'd be without the help. Here I made Jake come in and open a box of ding dongs (best present EVER).
I am running, squatting, eating pineapple, and shining a flashlight up my basement (head towards the light, dude). I say it's time. Here's to hoping next post will have me all puffy faced and blurry eyed in love with my new little dude. I just want to meet him!!

Two words: Battleship Hips

2009-09-28T05:05:00.000-07:00

It's 6 a.m. and what am I doing? Eating fruit snacks and staring hopelessly at a computer screen while I would MUCH rather be staring at the back of my eyelids. Sigh. I don't think I'll ever be friends with my old friend sleep again. It's making me go even MORE loony, if that's possible.

This last week has been one of the biggest roller-coasters of my entire life. It had the best of the best and the worst of the worstest in the world.

I choose to focus on the best.

Best - I AM OFF BED-REST. I made it!!! (I just did a bum jiggle, although that doesn't take much these days). I hit 36 weeks last week and the doctor said I could 'ease on up' out of bed rest. So I've been kicking my recliner repeatedly, like Chuck taught me, and trying to make up for two months lost time. It's just that no one told me how painful it is to waddle for more than five minutes. Or how my hips would make their own zip code, aching after being up all day. It hurts to be awake most days and I finally understand what women mean when they say they are 'done' being pregnant.

Yeah, he's cooked much longer than expected and I would be OK if he popped any minute. Only 3 weeks left.... 3 weeks.... I can make it, right???

BEST - I have been blessed with the best, most loving and generous family and friends in the world. They've given me several showers and I have a room full of love and generosity and cute cuddly boy things (including lots of hats.... rock on). The nursery is still pink - hopefully that will get conquered this week - and hopefully soon I can post pictures of the most awesome rockin pirate booty nursery in the WORLD. I am overwhelmed at the love and support of everyone around us. I don't know what I did to get so lucky. Or it could be pity for my over-sized baby mama hips. Either way.

BEST - Jake is still married to me, even after daily doses of me attacking him, and then crying on him, and then licking him, and then yelling, and even after he looks at my belly button. I don't know how he does it but he has special powers.

Yeah. SO - I was wondering, any tips on making baby ninjas dropkick their way out any faster? It's just my luck that he was so anxious to come before, now everything has shut off and he decided he is much more comfortable chillin in my belly, learning la cucaracha. Hot sauce??

Screw on the lid... TIGHT!!

2009-09-16T14:30:00.001-07:00

Pee. It's what's on my mind. Little piddley loves to rehearse his kickboxing right on my bladder which is soon to lead to public embarrassment.

More pee.

I had another doctor's check up today. Can I ever have a day without drama? Of course not, because I am mother to a ninja. I guess I am showing a few signs of early toxemia so they wanted to run a few more tests.

Test one: collect my own pee in a JUG and keep it in the fridge for 24 hours. Best thing ever, right?

What makes this worse is this is the THIRD time in my life I've had to do it. Seriously, what human being should have to submit to this torture more than once? A few years ago my right kidney stopped working fully and I had to do it. I endured the miserable 24 hour pee collection and turned it in, only to get a call the next day from the hospital that the lid wasn't screwed on tight enough, and they spilled it, and I had to re-do it for another 24 hours. (Gross. My pee was all over the floor of some lab without me putting it there. Wonder who cleaned it up.....)

This time, not even Chuck Norris would be able to pry the lid off when I screw it tight.

They call this beautiful contraption the 'hat.' I'm sick of hats in a whole NEW way now. I pee in it, with the expression shown above.

Then I get to take this pee from the above 'hat' and pour it into my awesome jug. My jug of pee. (Awesome sentence). And then it goes in my fridge.

After the pee test, I go to labor & delivery tomorrow to get blood drawn and the baby monitored for awhile. I am very positive that I am fine.... other than I might not be able to eat anything refridgerated every again.. and will be eating out for a few days.

Also, little awesome boy Heaton is transverse. Still laying completely sideways, torturing his mother in very special ways. That's why I look like I have TWO watermelons in my stomach. Ha!

Me and Ninja Chuck Norris

2009-09-09T18:29:00.000-07:00

Updates from the recliner:

Most people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris Pajamas.

Best way to make a beached whale pregnant lady's day: hook me up with Chuck Norris. And Satan's sword.

This picture may be my new favorite thing in this world.

And yes, I have already gone BEYOND insanity living on this dang recliner. I have started making lists of the cool ninja moves I am going to teach little baby Norris.

That sounds bad though... no, Chuck Norris is NOT the father.

Now that I've reached the point of incoherent rambling, I will stop. I just wanted to share the best picture ever!!

P.S..... I'm tired of making hats.

Would you say I have a plethora... of hats??!!

2009-09-03T20:56:00.000-07:00

Preggo update: great news: we have stopped labor! Bad news for me: bed rest until I want him to come. I tried to talk the doctor out of it, and tried batting my eyelashes (he asked if I was having a seizure), and then I tried crying, and lip quivering, but somehow he thinks because he's all MD and crap, he knows better, so he left me to be lounging around.

It's OK, I will win the lounge award of 2009.

So I've tried to pick up new hobbies to help with the horribleness that this lounging brings. I have to tell you, I have mad hat skills. OK, maybe not so much, but as you will see with my history with cakes, I am not quite the Martha Stewart I so aspire to be. But I have conquered the classy $5 Walmart hat loom. Here is my first attempt. It didn't so much turn out a hat, but more of a tube.. of ugliness, but a good first try:

Since then, I taught myself how to use not one, two, but THREE whole COLORS!! I have made 13 in 4 days, and I need a new hobby. Help.
In all reality, I am very very grateful that I am still pregnant and little pooper dude is still healthy and OK. I want him in there as long as I can. I am ever grateful for the many wonderful friends and family that have shown such compassion and concern. Thanks for the calls and prayers and Chuck Norris T-Shirts (I LOVE YOU DI!). I appreciate it more than you'll ever know.

Still Cooking!!

2009-08-25T11:36:00.001-07:00

Days and nights are seriously blurring into each other. I need one moment of a big fat WA-HINE (whine, whine) to complain: bedrest is not a vacation. I remembered how many days when I was working full time thinking how awesome laying around, without my bra, in fabulous stretchy pants, with tubs of cheetos and ding dongs watching movies all day. But it's so not that. I have been trying to take up reading, watching every TV show and movie ever made, toe juggling, counting body hairs ,and even knitting. (I am drowning in baby hats but that's for a whole other post!) But due to my severe attention defecit and being-a-spaz-at-all-times issues, I can't concentrate and just want to get up and walk. But this isn't something I can cheat at and just get up. My little ninja Chuck Norris (no, we are really NOT naming him Chuck, seriously) thinks that now everytime I get up he needs to start his business and I get more contractions, so I have to show him who's boss and lay here and poke him.

I'm so bored.

Bored, bored, bored. Whine, whine, whine.

OK, I'm done with that. I actually don't have too much to whine about because I am SO SO grateful I am still knocked up! The doctor said the ultimate goal is to get to at least 34 weeks, but hopefully longer since he has measured small. I'm at 32.... every week counts so much! I am grateful every morning I get up and he is still in there, hiding his ninja skills under my stretched belly button (it looks like an alien eye). I am very blessed!

I have also never been in such awe with my husband, Jake. He is not only smart, funny, caring, considerate, and has good dental hygiene, but I have never seen such PATIENCE. He has given me a bell that I ding when I need anything, and he really does it. He is now my cook, maid, rear end masseuss, therapist, crane (helps me up to the potty, yo), and he hasn't complained yet. I dont' know what I did to deserve him through all this, but I'm blessed. He is going to be the BEST daddy so at least our dude has SOME hope with one of his parents.

Look how cute he is with our nephew Greyson. AWWWW!!!

So my vast amount of time sitting I am trying to spend in deep reflection. Not really, but I spend it missing the times when I could waddle. How I want so bad to go on an hour waddle, wiggle, whatever. I did, however, find some pictures from the time right before I was put on bedrest. This first one we went to the drive in for the first time in our lives with our friends Rob & Ashley. Here Jake revealed that he is a felon - he stole some lifesaver things from the airplane. We are going to jail.
And who can forget girls night to say bye to Carrie before she left us for New York (she says she's going to grad school but I think she's really out there to marry a foreign diplomat with a mustache). I love these ladies and miss them every day!

Yes, that's my I just farted look. No wonder Jake saw that and wanted to impregnate it. Yowzah.

I might be inappropriate but I don't get out much.

Bed Rest

2009-08-14T08:42:00.000-07:00

I will forewarn you, this will not be a clever post. Not a happy, witty one, or an intellectual insightful one, it will be booby. (That means sad. I once bore my testimony about how I boob. I meant cry. That was embarrassing....)
We had a doctor's check up yesterday. I was 1000% expecting a good report. I have been feeling so much better and little Chuck is still round-house kicking his way all around. I have had some contractions but I didn't think anything to worry about.
So without giving you the gory details, the doctor checked all up my basement and we found another problem. HENCE: Bed rest. Bed rest with bathroom privileges.
Woah.
I don't think I'm so much as upset with the bed rest as I am with the thought that our little ninja might be affected. I am so worried about him. The doctor says that if it continues down this path, by next week we will be giving him shots for his lungs to prepare him to breathe for his early arrival.
I want him to cook for 10 more weeks. (I'm at 30). I am not ready for this. HE is not ready for this. I asked if we could just use a cork or duct tape or something to keep him in there but I guess that won't work. They also said I am measuring a week small so he might be even less prepared than I hoped. So much for my theory of an 80 pound dinosaur.
So, bed rest sucks. Not so much a vacation. But I am willing to do whatever I can for my boy. I want more than anything a healthy baby - the rest is inconsequential.
So every day he stays cooking will be a blessing. Every day, hopefully every week, and hopefully even a month or two....and hopefully he could even be late and I wont' even complain if he is 70 pounds and has a full beard. I really won't.
So I am sitting here, bra-less, trying not to boob, but boobing anyway, just worried. If anybody has any good hobbies to do while I work on my bum fat, let me know....

Little Baby Chuck Norris

2009-07-28T15:31:00.000-07:00

Brush back the tears, I am BACK to blogging. (yes, all two of you... meaning me... who missed me...). Summer is full of craziness and business and I love it!

We have had a crazy past few weeks that I would never care to repeat. Ever. But I do feel seriously SO blessed. Seriously. So blessed.
I am officially in the 3rd trimester. I get told all the time that I have been pregnant forever and believe me I KNOW IT. I don't think the little dude can possibly make my stomach stretch any further and there are 3 months to go. Ah, little dude. (No stretch marks yet but definitely ugly ugly ankles). We call him baby Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris Heaton IS his own weapon. He has earned his name by attempting to kick his way out of there. That or giving tae kwondo lessons, or maybe he's riverdancing. (I stick with the Chuck Norris theory - it's much more manly).

I am not complaining about the kicking though. We had quite a scare this week. On Sunday my stomach started to hurt. By about 8:00 I was having such bad cramping I felt like I was on my period and it didn't stop. I kept telling myself I am paranoid and just tried to go to bed. Within a few hours the pain was so bad I started vomiting nonstop. After waiting all night, I finally was smart enough to call the doctor (seriously, I don't have a brain) and he told me to go straight to labor and delivery. Not a good feeling at 27 1/2 weeks. Too early. They ran their tests and I was contracting heavily but not in labor. And I think my nurse had a perma wedgy and no one to love her as a child because she was not pleasant. She put me on pain meds and anti nausea and told me to go home because they didn't know what was wrong. I think she thought I wasn't serious. Or maybe it was bad gas.

This morning I got up and discovered I was bleeding heavily. I don't think I have EVER had such a sinking feeling, thinking something could be wrong with our miracle Chuck Norris. Jake rushed me back into the hospital where I was in sheer panic until I heard our little dude's little heartbeat. Yeah, he was kicking and dancing and hanging out like nothing was happening. Never have I been so SO relieved. They checked me and my cervix was still closed and I was not in labor - the bleeding was outside of the cervix (too much gross information, I know). I was contracting again and they gave me a shot and then everything... was fine. They still don't know why my body is cramping and contracting but I am not in preterm labor so they sent me home. I was told to sit and get fat until I meet with the doctor again on Thursday. I'm pretty good at that job. :)

I just feel very blessed to have him safe and sound and not here quite yet. I have been so often complaining about being pregnant and I know I needed some perspective... it was sure given. I don't want to complain any more. I want to do everything I can for him to get here, all safe and sound, and beautiful, and ready to beat up everyone else.

In the meantime, I still have been avoiding cameras. Over the 4th someone snuck in a shot where my belly is exposed, so that's the best I can do for a 'bump picture'. The remainder remain under lock and key to avoid pandemic. Plus I had to take one of Chuck at his first time at the fireworks. I hope you do not vomit.

Going Senile

2009-06-23T12:02:00.000-07:00

A few years ago my Grandma Funk started showing the first signs of dementia. She has since never ceased to entertain us with her -isms. She often forgets the real name of things and replaces them with other words. We still get a kick out of when she was yelling at my younger sister to quit running around without her feet on. (We think she meant shoes). Or when she woke up screaming because a cow was climbing in bed with her. It was a cat.

We love my Grandma and understand that this is beyond her control. But I have never really fully understood what she must feel until recently, when I have begun the early signs of Evz-heimers. Or pregnancy brain. Or maybe just getting dumber. Or maybe it's eating too many oranges. I don't know what it is, but my brain does NOT work.

The other day I got dressed and did some things around my house for more than an hour before I realized that I had not put a shirt on. I was wearing an open jacket, but no shirt. Just my bra and special underwear hanging all out over my bowl of a belly. Not so good.
I forgot to post about how my beautiful younger sister graduated from high school. She is now looking into piracy.

I forgot to post about how my fellow favorite knocked up sister Becca turned old and had her birthday. Happy Birthday, a month ago, Becca!

I forgot to post about how my wonderful mother-in-law went back to school and graduated from Bridgerland's Interior Design program and how proud we are of her. You better enjoy this picture because this is as close up of a baby bump picture that you will get for awhile. (I still think it looks like I eat tires).

Maybe it's because I turned 27. Old, old upper twenties. Maybe that's it. But one of these days I will forget to put my clothes on all together and cause quite a neighborhood sensation. I am in Utah County after all.

Here's a picture of me forgetting where my tongue goes. Becca seems a little constipated but Erica is just plain evil.

What was the point of this post? Yeah, I forgot.

Drum roll please

2009-06-04T16:55:00.000-07:00

Today was the day I've been peeing my pants for weeks thinking about... the day of the big ultrasound. Thankfully I remembered to put on CLEAN pants before we went out.
Honestly, all we wanted to hear was that it was either all boy or all girl, not with both parts, and really just HEALTHY.

So, with a drum roll, and a dum dum dum (because I can't think of a creative way to announce this)....

IT'S A BOY.

He's 100% healthy with all his fingers and toes and he has a thing with his feet. He kept trying to smell them. I'm trying not to worry too much yet, but if he tries to keep putting his feet in his mouth during prom, I'm pulling out the big guns.

We have been concerned with this pregnancy because my body is not like most bodies, and there has been anxiety with how this would be for me and the baby. After 3 1/2 months of being sick ALL DAY, that went away and I just feel... hungry. I am getting frequent headaches and still considered high risk, but all that matters is that my baby is still healthy. My little dude with his little boy parts. I love it!! What a miracle that we thank God for each day.

Killer Boogers, and Happiness

2009-05-26T09:48:00.000-07:00

We have had a good couple of past weeks. I have spent the last five or so years of life in a constant state of stress. Seriously. Basketcase stress. Enough already. My life is now dedicated to happiness.
It does help with stress levels that even though I am on a wicked mad job hunt, I get to wear pj's all day and am learning to knit. Evelyn, the fearless rockstar, knitting? Yes, I'm HARDCORE, YO!!! Knitting brings happiness, I tell you. ...OK, I really need a job...

One more thing that brings me happiness: the Neti Pot. For a few weeks now, my husband (who will be totally mad at me telling this story but this is what he gets for never reading my blog) has been complaining of severe pain in his nose. He keeps thinking it is some sinus infection but I think it is either a tumor or a killer booger. Maybe it's the little man my mom told me about that bites your finger when you pick your nose. Anyways, Jake keeps whining about it and we have tried everything to get rid of it. Since our health insurance doesn't kick in until June 1st, we are all about home remedies. I followed Oprah's advice and got him the Neti Pot. Worth the eight dollars and MUCH MUCH more for the sheer entertainment value of watching him pour water up one nostril and it come out the other.

Take Luck!!!

2009-05-13T10:41:00.000-07:00

Around 7:00 Friday night Jake and I met our friends Rob & Ashley for dinner. They were on their way to St. George because they had tickets to the sold-out show of the best comedian ever, Brian Regan (get some leaves!!!!).

Then we had a brilliant idea.... we should go TOO. It didn't matter that the show had been sold out for months.... we were going to be like ROCK STARS, living on a WING AND A PRAYER. That's right. We were going to try and be... spontaneous!! Duh, duh, duh (that is the evil music).We had a blast. We ended up packed and on the road by 9:00 p.m. and rolled into St. George around 1 a.m. I even stayed awake. Rock star. We spent Saturday hiking through Red Rock which was awesome. Saturday night we still didn't have tickets but went anyway, praying somebody would scalp them. Five minutes before the show started, I think my quivery lip worked, because a guy approached Jake and sold us TWO THIRD ROW TICKETS. Yeah. It was awesome and if you don't already know Brian Regan, make him your friend. He will change your life.

We spent the next day waddling through Zion's and Bryce Canyon. It was so nice to be out in the sun (I may have caused a few traffic accidents with the glow off my skin).

Here are Rob & Ashley in his pimp car. He can do THIS, but I can ride a bike with no handlebars.

Worst part of the trip, though, was when we went out for breakfast. I was STARVING. I ordered a double order of crepes. The waitress looked disgustedly at my big swollen 'pot belly' and said, "You sure you don't want a half order? That's one whole crepe." And I said, "DOUBLE order. With HASH BROWNS. And four tons of BUTTER." Rude.

It was a wonderful impromptu weekend. I think the baby liked it too because I think I felt it move for the first time... or it was gas... from the crepes. Either way, fun.

And if you haven't heard already, my little sister Becca has the best news ever!!!!!!!!! YAY!!!! Preggers!!!

I miss my friend sanity.

2009-05-08T10:40:00.000-07:00

Well, it's not like I ever had MUCH sanity but any inkling of that has been lost.

We are officially Utah-rds again and honestly we love it so far! We are doing our best to fit in and say words right like 'moun-ennnn' and 'oh my HECK.' We are worried if people are around us too long, though, we might get kicked out.

I have officially spent the first two weeks in almost 10 years without a full time job. Oh dear. That's all I should say. I have enjoyed so many things, like wearing my robe until noon and never missing an episode of Price is Right. I have even tried cooking but I almost blew up my house so we'll see how far that goes in the future..... I am so used to being busy that I'm not sure what to do with all this time. I am on the hunt for another job but I am starting to look more pregasaurus than having a big donut belly so I'm a little concerned about people wanting to hire me.... oh, the woes. Woe.

The hardest part is having all this free time to think. I have been so excited about the baby and how things are going. ...but now, I have started to realize that one day this baby will come OUT, and then... oh crap. We will be responsible for it. Some nights I get so scared that I can't sleep, just worried that I will forever traumatize and screw up our helpless little miracle. Plus I also have a fear it will be ugly. Rude, I know. (I have thought of MANY ways to cover it up, though, involving hats and helmets).

Thanks to savvy Becca, though, I have discovered that I can still look AWESOME while I vacuum with my baby. Check this out:

And one more thing: Stretchy pants were sent from heaven.

Changes. Ah.

2009-04-21T10:27:00.000-07:00

It’s official – we are moving. We know beyond a shadow of a doubt that it is the right thing to do, even if we don’t have it all figured out yet.
This has been a stressful thing to say the least, since we had a week to prepare. Jake and I went down this weekend to find a place to live. That was a scary experience. I am still rocking bath and forth from the trauma. We went to countless places where I expected to find dead hippies in the closet among the cockroaches. By Saturday we were getting really discouraged. We decided to just drive around to areas we liked – we found the cutest little townhome for rent in Pleasant Grove that was an AWESOME deal. Yay for not living in a place with cottage cheese ceilings where we will die when we lick the walls! Here is a picture and since I am what people call 'slow' I can't figure out how to rotate it in the right direction.
One of the ultimate signs to me that this was meant to be is how everything has fallen into place. We have already found a nice CLEAN little family to rent our house and they will move in this weekend. Can I get a halle-freakin-llujah and a WHEW in da house, people??!!! I have been finishing out the last week at my job while Jake is at home packing. I am under orders from the doctor to do no moving, which is actually more frustrating than anything because I feel like a lazy, dictator cow. I hate asking for help and I hate having to see him work so hard and I get to eat chicken wings and massage my belly. Oh well. This is how I am handling the stress. I decided I am a walrus.
I am excited to be in Utah again but hate this moving thing and having to start over. I pray we survive it through this week!! Jake is handling it by pretending to be Japanese.

For those in Utah, please come visit. We need mental help!

Decisions, Decisions

2009-04-14T08:31:00.000-07:00

I have always and forever HATED making decisions. I can be opinionated, bossy, obnoxious, and gassy, but regardless, big decisions are always hard. We are in the midst of a HUGE, MIND-BLOWING decision that has me all wrapped up in turmoil and uncertainty. (OK, I’m dramatic, but it’s still a big decision).

Jake lost his job several months ago. It has been a trial for us, unlike anything we’ve been through before, but we know beyond a shadow of a doubt that we have looked on from a power greater than our own. Even on the day he was laid off, I never felt stressed because a peace came over both of us - that we would somehow be OK. It was only the week after he lost his job that we found out we were pregnant. It has been confusing to think that we felt so strongly we were to come to Boise, for Jake’s job specifically, only to lose it and then be blessed with something we always wanted but not know how to take care of the future…. again we somehow felt we’d be OK.

Jake was wonderful to bounce back and applied at hundreds of places, from Home Depot to selling cell phones. I have been amazed at his attitude during this process. I also know I have been fortunate to have a good job, but it pays nowhere near enough to support our family, including an expensive, diaper-wearing miracle that will soon join us.
A few weeks ago Jake got a job painting – definitely not the dream but something he was willing to do to get money in and to make ends meet for our family. That same week we heard from a web design company down in Orem, Utah that he’d applied to more than a month ago. We had decided after he applied that we should stop looking for jobs in Utah because it is just not good timing…. We had kind of written it off.
Jake still did several phone interviews with this company and not surprisingly, because he is FABULOUS, they loved him. They met with us last week when we were down for Easter to offer Jake a position. It is a good offer which would enable us, if we’re careful, to be able to have me stay home with Piddley.

Here’s the problem: our wonderful house. We had every intention of being in Boise permanently and bought our house because the buyers market truly was awesome. We have called our realtor back and even though we got our house for an amazing deal, the market up here is still horrible to sell and there’s no way we could sell it. Yeah. Crap. It also means having to change insurance/doctors/hospitals for my big old preggo self. It means leaving so many good friends and familiarity that we have made, and probably moving into a 1 bedroom basement apartment.

Pros: Jake would be HAPPY in his job (they have rock band parties every week, come on!) and we would be closer to family (Becca is cringing).

We have been fasting and praying and thinking hard. What do we do?

Ramblings of a Freaking Crazy Preggo

2009-04-01T09:42:00.000-07:00

So I have determined that being preg-a-saurus is not so much an easy thing. Really…. Yeah. We have wanted a baby for a long time, and we are so thrilled (thanks for all your congrats!) but I never thought much about the pregnancy thing…. So I feel guilty for complaining about being pregnant, because it’s a miracle, but it is TOTALLY not what I expected. I have such new-found respect and admiration for all my friends that have been through this, and even so many more that have felt it worse than I have!

I do not have morning sickness – I have all day long sickness. The smell of my very own dear husband sends me into instant gagging and convulsions. The other day I exorcist vomited over my friend’s shoes because she ate yams in front of me, and just the name of ‘yams’ made me sick. We can no longer watch food commercials because I need a bucket close by.
And to make it worse, my boobs have NOT gotten bigger yet. What's the deal??
Then there’s the tired thing. I think I could sleep for 4 million years. I actually kind of like that, but it doesn’t help when it’s 11 a.m. at work and I’m in a meeting and I start drooling. Yes, it happened. They call me Drooly, the 8th Dwarf.
And I swear, I already waddle. I am 12 weeks along…. I shouldn’t even show, but I waddle. Sigh.

So let me sigh to you about the drama of this weekend. My body has been going through all these wonderful changes and if you can even imagine, the hormones have made me even MORE crazy. I decided it was time to get a new haircut and highlight so I could feel somewhat better about myself. The hair change ALWAYS helps. The lady that normally does my hair quit because she had a baby, so I made an appointment with another lady at her salon. I was paranoid and she re-assured me the hair dye and everything would be perfectly safe and normal. She was a liar.
Everywhere she tried to put brown, it turned fluorescent orange. No joke. Like a hunter hopped up on 80’s pills. I started BAWLING right there in the chair. I told her to just shave it. Bald is better than looking like one of those things they flag planes with. She told me that she has never seen it happen, but my hormones must have been so crazy they made my hair turn orange. Cry. So she ended up putting blonde everywhere to get rid of the orange, but now I look like a wanna-be Dolly Parton. I am BLONDE. I am too afraid to get it fixed, for fear it could turn green or rainbow or just fall out…. So the next 6 weeks I will be a waddling, Dolly-Parton, drooling, cry-at-car-commercials psychopath. It’s going to be a long time until October…….

BIG, HAPPY NEWS!!!

2009-03-23T07:43:00.000-07:00

I've been waiting to say this news for over four years....

WE ARE GOING TO HAVE A BABY.

Somehow miracles and tears and prayers all worked together and I am on my way to being a baby mama.
Little Piddley Poo will be here around October 23rd. (Considering our family history, though, we should expect an 80 pound monster sometime around Thanksgiving).

I just want to say... YAY!

Like, Totally 80's!

2009-03-19T11:27:00.001-07:00

Last week we had a ward activity where you were supposed to dress from your era. We are totally 80's, BABY!!
Jake and I had a lot of fun pulling out the stretch pants and Aqua net. I thought it would totally come back to me naturally, with my previous big bang skills and moon-dancing.
Sadly, I was mistaken. I could not do the 80's very well. Could not pull it off.
But Jake is even worse. We couldn't decide if he was a lazy, New Kid on the Block with a big kid or a 90's pedophile.

Word to the wise, don't ever add your own Madonna beauty mark. By the end of the night, it was a mustache.

I might always say I'm getting old but I think I'm glad the 80's are a thing of the past. Ugly.

Forts Rule, Chickens Drool

2009-03-04T10:13:00.000-08:00

We have been under a lot of stress lately, and I know most of you are as well. Life is stressful, period. But being as crazy as I already am on a NORMAL day, I crack under stress. I lose it. I have two stages: stage one, you will find me huddled in the fetal position, wearing a towel as a turban, and rocking a Barbie doll to sleep. Stage two: I go nuts. I get uncontrollably hyper, constantly rambling about nothing that coherently makes any sense whatsoever. This is when people often accuse me of being on drugs.
I AM my own drug, just as much as Chuck Norris IS his own weapon.

We have done a few good things to cope with the stress. We decided to just ignore it and went down and stayed in a condo in Wolf Creek with our friends Kisty & Andrew. The weirdest part about this little weekend trip was that chickens seemed to follow us around. They were all over this cute little restaurant we found, and then again were found in the condo. I don’t get the whole decorate-with-chickens thing. To each his own, I guess. I just prefer to keep farm animals out of my decor, especially in kitchens, because we are constantly eating them. I don’t want that reminder.

Jake named this chicken 'Donk'. Good name. We are thinking about it for a prospect for our future child.

I am not trying to eat the chicken. I just am showing my lovely big mouth.

Fun thing #2 – the best, cheapest way to deal with stress, is to build a fort. We built a fort in our living room last weekend. We were laying around, whining about stuff, and I thought…. Forts rule. Forts TOTALLY rule. We watched a movie under our fort. You can totally tell we are getting old, though, because our butts went numb after laying on the floor and we ended up tearing it up halfway through the movie so we could sit on the cushy couch.

Anyone have any other positive ways of stress management? I would prefer no chickens to be involved, though.

2009-02-18T10:41:00.000-08:00

Secretly, I totally wish a vampire would bite me. For real. Jake always tells me that he has never seen a day where I don’t trip or spill on myself. I am like Bella, times one million. I have been waiting for the day when a vampire will bite me for the sheer fact that THEN I would be somewhat graceful.

So I have been feeling gross lately. Usually it’s all I can do to drag myself out of bed, throw a ponytail in, and do a double-take smell on my socks to make sure they’re clean. I decided this morning that I would have a very classy day. I got up on time, SHAVED (not my back, but my legs), froo-frood my hair, put on a cute skirt, and wore my heeled hooker boots. I finally was able to look in the mirror and not break out into sheer terror. Yes, I was feeling quite classy.
I felt super classy in my shiny black car on my way to work. I wasn’t even late today! I also felt very classy when I got out of the car, grabbed my matching bag, my water bottle, and my banana. Only really classy people eat bananas, and since I was classy today, it was a necessity.
So I walk into the office and see a family waiting for me up front. As I’m walking to greet them, I think an invisible midget grabbed my heels, because all of the sudden the earth gave away underneath me. I just in-explicably went FLYING. Seriously, FLYING, not tripping. I flew backwards. I think I covered a ten foot distance. To make this scene even more awesome, I dropped my banana, and landed in it. Mooshed banana on a classy skirt is not so pleasant.
I’m not so classy anymore. I would give anything to go back home, get out of my banana skirt, and put on my pink sweat pants.

:)

2009-02-13T15:14:00.000-08:00

Challenges are what make life interesting; overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.
-Joshua J. Marine

Isn't life funny? I have often looked back on my rantings and ravings and totally realize that I can be ungrateful and complain too often. I am sorry for being a whiner. I don't want to be. I try to be positive, because I know that what happens to us in life is a lot about attitude. As stated in my previous post, I truly do have much to be thankful for.
I have now determined that Satan is a loser. Boo Satan. He tries to get into my head, make me whine, make me not see past the current situation, and tries to get me to neglect the bigger picture.
I am truly grateful for the belief I have that there is a greater purpose than sometimes we can see right in front of us.
That's right. Boo Satan!

Reasons to Smile

2009-01-20T08:57:00.000-08:00

I might be alone in this, but lately I've been having a lot of days where I don't want to get out of bed. Days where I want to lay around in my bright pink sweatpants, (or maybe my spandex tights and legwarmers), watch the Price is Right, leave potato chips all over my belly, and pretend to scratch. I usually resist these urges as much as I can, seeing as how I probably would get fired really fast if I showed up in pink-potato-chip-covered pants, but some days it's hard to smile. I think it's the January blues. So I thought I would remind myself of the many reasons I have to smile today, because I need this.
Reason #1 - I am becoming the all-time cake conqueror. This means I can now bake them without them falling apart. I made this for Jake's birthday ...TA DA!

Reason #2 - Boys. I've pretty much loved boys my whole life. With six sisters, you sometimes can get tired of girls really fast. (But I LOVE YOU ALL). I never thought I could get a boy to stand to be around me all day, let alone forever..... but I guess I did. And a cute one! (I was very sneaky... I underestimate my own sneakiness). He also came in a package deal where I now have several bro-in-laws. My sisters also tricked some other boys into submission. Now instead of discussions revolving around hairspray and bra padding, we get to listen to things about werewolves, cars, burping and scratching (besides the normal Becca gassiness) and BOY talk. I LOVE BOYS!!! Christmas we spent with Jake's family, and with three boys together, I decided that boys are still something that make me smile. Trick for funniest thing ever: watch Mamma Mia and have boys make up their own dialogue.

Reason #3 - Crazy sisters who like to talk about Satan and bite each other. See below. Yes, I think we grew up next to a power plant. Or maybe drugs.

Reason #7. (It's not in order, but I like the number 7 the best.) Rubber Mallets. You can never guess what I got Jake..... yeah, it's a mallet. It hurts when you hit your head with it. I tried several times and it hurt several times.

Best reason ever to smile: Jake, and pigs.

Yeah, today should be bright and shiny. Smile.

Move over, Jake!

2009-01-09T14:59:00.000-08:00

I am pretty darn-tootin happy right now. This has been a week full of very good news.
First, I have fallen in love.... with someone other than Jake. There is a NEW man in town.

Jake's sister Chantel gave birth to my favorite new person on Wednesday. Greyson Carl Demill made his grand entrance. He is a whopper - 9 pounds, 10 ounces, and 23 inches long. He has the biggest feet I've ever seen. I will have to teach him not to tip over, and how to win arm-wrestling contests with his toes. I am an aunt for the first time ever. My mom pointed out that Aunt Evelyn makes me sound like the oldest lady ever. Yeah. I love him!!

Other good news (hopefully) - we have offer #2 pending on our house as of this afternoon. Hopefully more good news is to come. If we sell it, I will do WHATEVER I am dared to do in celebration. Hmmm..... the possibilities.
:) I love good news!

2009-01-06T08:34:00.000-08:00

I love reading blogs about Christmas. They are joyous and wonderful. I, myself, had a really joyous and wonderful Christmas. I took lots of happy, joyous, and scary photos.

But I am not going to post those now.

I WILL blog about the world's biggest pancake. And the butter ball. The thing is, this was not the main dish. This came as a SIDE to an omelette. It has dual purposes in serving as a flotation device during catastrophic events. It also makes babies cry.

I am also going to blog about my dad. He is old. He had ANOTHER birthday. (I KNOW, right?) So we did the nicest thing that you do for the elderly... we got him a walker.

It is also an appropriate time to tell you of my most recent attempt versus cakes. Jake and I hit the big FOUR years of blissful, drooly marriage in December. I celebrated by creating a masterpiece.... of goo. I tried to make homemade frosting. It was more of a brown puddle. But at least the cake didn't crumble this time!!

I know, I rock.

Yeah, four blissful years. You can see how excited Jake is.

Fo shizzle!!

Things that make me go.... ewww. twitch

2008-12-15T11:19:00.000-08:00

Have you ever just looked at some things and wondered WHY somebody ever thought of those things? Like doilies. What is the purpose? They scare me. They remind me of funeral homes. Why does anybody need a doily? If you want to set something on a glass table, use a coaster. And those finger-less gloves. Isn't the purpose of the gloves to keep your fingers warm?

I found some things that evoked that same reaction. We found this fish, full of balls, in our hotel room. Why? WHY would you want this fish full of balls? I understand you want to keep all your shiny balls together, but why in a fish?

And the best of all things creepy, I found this creepy grandma fairy. She was in a Christmas store, staring at me with her evil eyes behind those evil spectacles. I think she might represent Satan, really. Why would ANYONE ever need a creepy grandma fairy.... with a fan? If she's so HOT, then maybe she should take that thing off her neck.

I know I'm not always the brightest person, but I don't get it.

November - smooching, babies, jig

2008-12-08T13:22:00.000-08:00

I LOVE the fall. I love sweaters, falling leaves, jackets, hot chocolate, fireplaces, turkey, spandex, pudding, and squishy things. (These are all fall things, of course). This fall has FLOWN by, and November especially was FABULOUS.

I was reminded of so many things to be grateful for this month. I am BLESSED in so many things and need to remind myself of this more often.

I am blessed in love. I am married to the most wonderful, dimpled, drooly, stinky, handsome, quirky, intelligent man for me that has ever existed. I don't know how I suckered him into picking me (I think it involved a baseball bat and Valium), but I am so lucky. I was reminded of all these TENDER PRECIOUS feelings when one of my best friends in this world, Kisty, was married to the love of her life this month. We had the privilege of being present in the Salt Lake Temple to witness their wonderful sealing. They were so happy and so perfect for each other, and it's good to be reminded of these things once in awhile. I got to catch up with a few friends I haven't seen in awhile, like Carrie, Kristen, and Emily. LOVE!!

Kristen & I waited outside of the temple after the wedding in the freezing cold so that we could embarrass Kisty with some inappropriate question about the wedding night right when she came out. What are friends for?

I am also so blessed with my friends. I'm so grateful to all of you for putting up with my fat cheeks and farting noises and rampages about teenagers. Here below you see beautiful Kristen, Kisty, and retard. (I was half involved in an Irish jig).

Get a room!!!The very next day, my good friend from high school Angela is so wonderful and put together a baby shower for our friend Afton. It was a lot of fun! I got to see a few other friends I hadn't seen since that time too and it's always fun to catch up.
Afton is having a little girl and I can't think of anyone else that would make a greater mother. She mothered me all through high school when it was much needed! She always helped me get back in line and wiped my snotty nose!
Jake's sister Chantel is also having a baby boy in January and we threw a shower for her. It was also full of good things like food, poo talk, and belly rubbing. I am very grateful to see so many people I love being blessed with their own little families. My time will come, I know!!

I'm seriously so blessed (snicker, snicker..... foul noise).. No, really, I am!! Even with bad, sad, lonely, angry, and smelly days, I am making the effort to whine a little less and appreciate more!

Don't tell me my biz-ness, debil woman!

2008-11-18T08:53:00.001-08:00

I often lament about my aging. I can’t help it – I am an ornery old cat lady and was always MEANT to be one. I am recently encountering the worst thing about aging yet – the curse of devil sugar.
I have always, ALWAYS been such a sweet tooth. I always prided myself as well when I was younger of eating more than ten men and seven gorillas. Then this whole aging thing hits, where instead of all those extra calories magically disappearing, they somehow get stuck in lumps on your body. What’s the deal, seriously?
My curse seems to be of the cheeks. I don’t gain weight anywhere as much as my CHEEKS. (Well, the bum ones AND the head ones). To this, I say …. No. I figure I better stop the cheek gaining before it turns into my body looking like a lump of cottage cheese inside a garbage bag. I have been exercising regularly (including jazzercising) and TRY to eat so well. I JUST CANNOT WITHSTAND THE EVIL TEMPTATIONS!! How do you stay strong when everyone around you all day is eating mountains of fabulous sugar? How can I get my head, with the fat cheeks and all, to say no to my very conniving tummy? And WHY is it that some people, my hot husband included, can EAT this satan-derived goodness and STILL not look so … cheeky??

Rodent be gone

2008-11-09T08:30:00.001-08:00

OK, I'm insane, and I know it. Things are getting better here after this whole life-change thing, but it doesn't make me any less crazy. We are starting to meet some awesome new people, work is getting really interesting as they are training me to start diagnostical drug/alcohol assessments on kids, and we're facing the ever-important life changing decisions: grad school, babies, babies, babies, fat rolls, and puppies.
I just think I am going through my first mid-life crisis. I can't really get a tattoo, I don't need hair implants, and I already have enough metal in me and don't need piercings. I had other crazy ideas, like starting a cat breeding business in the wilderness, but I don't like cats and dirt makes me cough. So I gave in and took the majority vote on what to do when you're in a funk: I chopped my hair.

Ev: 'I look like a wet rat with this hair. Fix it.'
Hair lady: 'I'm afraid of rats.'
I haven't really been this dark before, but I LIKE IT!! I'm so sassy I think I can pass gas in public and get away with it!

Does it still look like a chipmunk died on my head? Part of going through mid-life crises is reinforcement!

Hey Satan

2008-11-04T09:48:00.000-08:00

It's Election Day. I have pretty strong political views.... and I could create a very patriotic, intelligent post concerning the aforementioned views. It seems all everyone around me is consumed with. So today I just want to post about Satan.

Ev: "Hey Satan."

Jake: "I have awesome horns."

Last weekend we had the chance to carpool with Jake's sis down to Utah to see the family. We forgot to bring Halloween costumes for the annual party, so we decided to just be evil. See above.

Jake also thought he would be a double-dresser-upper and he decided to be a rapstar with my daddy. Here we have 'The Real Slim Jakey' and 'Papa Smurf......Masta P". Wiki Wiki. Dad's sunglasses are girl's glasses, by the way. I think we ruined him.....

We split the time in between Jake's family and my family. I also decided to add to my self-depracating sense of humor and post yet another embarrassing thing.... this picture. This has got to be the most attractive one I have ever taken. I am imagining Jake thinking...."I'm so lucky to have married a woman who looks like a transvestite that has awesome fish lips".

That night we had the annual Baird Halloween party. It was a bittersweet time. It was the first year since our dear Candace has passed and she always loved this party especially. We still had fun. I mean, how can you not smile a little when Richard Simmons is in your midst?

I'm also very proud of this last picture. This is the first girls picture where my butt is NOT sticking out in front of everybody. Yeah for going all conservative, Ev!!

I wish everybody a Happy Election Day. Try to watch out for Satan!

You're not Cool unless you Drool

2008-10-30T12:57:00.000-07:00

I have discovered an awesome, AMAZING new talent. One that will leave you shaking in your seat out of jealousy. (Please, try to control yourselves). I've always known I'm a drooler. I awaken each morning to the pleasant sensation of moisture on my pillow. I will fall asleep cuddling with my boy, and wake up to drool all up his chest. It's a pretty attractive thing.

At my new job, I have a lot more down-time in between clients and projects. It's something I'm not really used to. Add on top of that that most nights I don't sleep more than 4 hours.... I get a little drowsy and woozy. I was sitting here at work today, staring at the computer, and I found myself drooling. Drooling, completely awake and sitting up, so bad that it hit the desk. I always knew it took talent to drool in your sleep, but doing so AWAKE, and SITTING UP, now THAT is pretty amazing!!!

Smacking and crying

2008-10-09T08:08:00.001-07:00

I am being a big old baby, I think. I have been so excited for this exciting move to Boise and all the needed changes it is bringing to our lives. Jake and I knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that it was meant to be and we need to be here. But I can't help the feeling over the last couple of weeks that my life has been turned all flippity and I just am so.... homesick!! Honestly, I love the area up here, our new house, and our new jobs. It's just that I've hit this patch of... I don't know, weirdness.
It is pathetic that this is the first big move for me. After high school I moved all the way from Tremonton to Logan. One big old fat half-hour.
I was lucky to be able to experience many things, to travel all over the country and the world, but I never stayed for longer than 6 weeks. Now here I am, in the middle of Idaho (not the scariest place), and I am SKEERED (that's white trash talk for scared). Jake's sister is up here and we are very blessed to have her, because without her I think we would be utterly lost. We have only been up here to go to our new ward once, and it is so huge, I think three people noticed we were new. Our neighborhood is all new construction and so there aren't many people we have met. Work is awesome, and I have so many people who are so nice here, but we still feel so...alone? Bwah.
Here are a few things I miss. I never thought I'd say this, but I miss my old job. Not really the job, but a lot of the familiarity and the people. I really miss my friend Jamy because she was my sanity. This picture explains it - here she is eating a magic pickle.
We still keep in touch but it's not the same!! I miss going on treat runs every day, and to making fun of everyone we see, and to being able to vent. I totally miss having my own office. At my new job in the Court up here, we're in the transition of moving to another building so they set me up front by the receptionist. She is fabulous and funny, but all I hear all day is her smacking her gum. I think I'm going crazy. I was spoiled to be able to shut the door and only listen to MYSELF smacking, to being able to smell only myself, and to doing the macarena if I so wished.
Here are Mandy, Jamy, and I at a conference in St. George. Miss those too.

I miss my fam-damily. Even the Becca thing. I miss not being able to pick up and drive home when a sister is having an emergency or being able to meet my mom in Logan. Bwah.
I miss my old neighborhood terribly. We were so blessed to have such an amazing ward with so many friends and neighbors. I miss my young women. They are so cute and keep me updated through emails about everything. Here is Nichelle on her FIRST DATE!!
I missed it and I wasn't able to be there to embarrass her and try to make her date go running!!

I'm sure I will start to feel comfortable up here with time, but it's hard getting there. I've hit this identity crisis thing where nothing is familiar to me, especially not myself. I dont' know if I am making sense, and probably it's more of this in-coherent rambling that you all shake your head sympathetically and say 'Dumb, crazy old cat lady Ev' under your breath at me, but I am just having a.... weird time. I just want to know... has anyone been here? What can I do to feel better? My coping mechanisms include a robe, avocados, vaseline, and sticky notes.... so they're not very great. I'm looking for any help I can get! Bwah!!!

Oh No you did-unt!!!

2008-10-07T15:15:00.000-07:00

Jakey found this picture on a website. I have not been able to stop laughing for oh, say, three days straight. I need to wear plastic underpants.

To chop.... or not to chop.... (dying sounds)

2008-09-30T13:58:00.000-07:00

So, there are many occasions where I hate being a girl. Don't get excited - I am not looking to be a BOY with all their friggidy-diggidyness, but some things aren't at ALL fair to us glorious women creatures. AM I RIGHT, LADIES? The whole carrying-a-baby, pushing-a-watermelon-out-a-hole-the-size-of-a-chapstick-tube, monthly happy hour thing..... not so crazy about.

One of the things on my hate-the-drama-girl list is the problem of hair. If I had it my way, we would all be bald, beautiful, shiny people. Boys can live in that world. They never have to worry about these things, and they just get to play with mud.

I try to be pretty un-dramatic, anti-girl (oh wait....) but HAIR is one thing I will never get a handle on. I have never liked my hair since the day after I got married. Never worried or hardly cared about it too much before that. But then the hair got old the minute I hurtled myself over the altar. I have had many wonderful friends and family, especially Julie and April, who have cut and helped with the hair. I always love the haircut- for like 2 weeks, or right after THEY style it and do it. And then it's back to the same old I-wanna-break-the-mirror-everytime-I-look-in-it crap. What is the deal? Is it just crazy diddly me or am I yet to find the right haircut for my big old face?

So I find myself in a freak-out-being-a-girl moment. I almost went and hacked all the hair off on my lunch break. The person I see in the mirror is definitely some lunatic that I don't know anything about. I have been growing my hair out over the last 9 months. The longer it gets, the more I hate it. It's in the stupid in-between stage of dumbness, and I keep thinking the longer it gets, the more I'll like it. Or will I hate it more and regret it?? I'm not so good at doing the hair and so is it worse to go short?
I am very lucky to be married to a wonderful, playing-in-the-mud-kind-of-boy, that always tells me he loves me and I'm beautiful to him no matter what. But he's a liar too. He will never help me with the hair question.

So I am pleading, begging, on my knees, tears in my eyes, and with GIRL drama, to ask for your input. To chop.... or not to chop.... that is the question!! And-I-promise-not-to-put-so-many-dashes-in-my-future-sentences too!

6 Quirks!!!!!!

2008-09-17T12:16:00.000-07:00

Di, my good friend, is fabulous but sometimes evil. Those who know me know I can't be dared or told to do something and NOT do it. So she dared to tag me, and I will dare to do it.
**Side note**I feel bad about delaying the posting for so long but life has been like a big bag of vomit and a hurricane. It's been SO crazy!! I am trying to get the house put together so there will be no pictures until I can get out of boxes. (Ah, the shame). But we're alive and happy!!

Quirk #1 - I have the most freaky feet ever known to exist. My left one is a huge size 9 1/2. My right one is a size 8. Not a lie. I would show a picture, but I'd hate for anyone to get sick or die. This makes shoe shopping the very most miserable thing in the ENTIRE world. I usually end up with the shoes the BIG foot sizes and I 'stuff' the other foot... kind of like I stuff my bra. I guess it's for this reason that I hate everybody else's feet. If you want to make me mad, show me your foot.

Quirk #2 - Jake and I make up our own words. It's shameful to say that I started this whole madness. This happens on many random occasions - usually when we're out driving. Our favorite words to date are 'Cheebers' and 'Heejos'. We use these words in about every conversation with each other. Example: "How are you today Jake?" -Ev
"I am feeling rather cheebers and pretty heejos. How are you Ev?" - Jake
"I am gassy." - Ev
If you can't understand us, please don't feel bad. We know.

Quirk #3 - I have an obsession with clean laundry, and especially with clean towels. Clean, laundry smelling towels make me feel classy. I LOVE to do laundry. If I am having a bad day, I will tear clothes off the rack that I haven't worn in awhile just so they can smell fresh. One of the most exciting things about moving into my new house is all the linen closets I can fill with clean towels for guests. (Please, come be my guest!) In heaven, I imagine I will be surrounded in fresh towels that I can roll around on and say 'Cheebers!'

Quirk #4 - I am both-handed. Smart people use the word ambi-dextrous, but I'm not one of those people. I mostly write with my left hand but switch hands for pretty much everything else. This came in handy when the right side of my body was all paralyzed. Yeah, it's pretty much the coolest thing ever to be able to spill food with BOTH hands.

Quirk #5 - I have dreams in Spanish. Most of you should know I am fluent in Spanish - grew up speaking it. And my job has made me use it daily, just to yell and make fun of people. I will wake myself up all the time screaming at the devil in Spanish. I wonder what this really means......

Quirk #6 - I can ride a bike with no handlebars.

Because I am such a sucker for getting 'tagged' I will just tag EVERYBODY.

Quirk #6 -

Homeless bum and slave labor

2008-08-26T12:26:00.000-07:00

Wow, so I know I've gone absentee for awhile.... life again hit me in the face like spandex on a biker's bum.... AAHHH.

I have been slave labor for the past three weeks straight. I thought quitting would give me time to play and sleep in... not so much. We basically had to put six months of work into two weeks to finish our house in Franklin in time to list it. It was many sleepless nights, headaches, and owies that we finally got it ready, without a minute to spare. It was officially listed two days ago. Already some interest .... so we'll just wait, pray, and see!! Here are a few pictures I got from the MLS. They're not the greatest and hopefully I can post them later when I unpack our camera....

Here's the front. I wish I had one from the other angle. Jake built a 3-car detached garage as well as a deck and patio off the side.

This is our re-done bathroom. It previously had a lavendar cast iron tub, lavendar sink, and matching lavendar toilet. Needless to say this is an improvement.

And our Master..... there is puke, guts, and glory all rolled up into this room.

So we are officially in Boise. Without a home, yes.... but complete bums, not so much. Our car is loaded full of stuff but with nowhere to put it. We were supposed to close on our brand new house last week... but day after day, little things have come up with the lender. He needs another paper, he filed the wrong one, etc. So Sunday night, we were both scheduled to start jobs but with nowhere to go. So our temporary place of residence is in the fabulous Oxford Suites in downtown Boise.

Job for me, you might ask. (Well, you're probably not asking that but I am going to tell you anyway). I wasn't actually planning on working once the move came. I wanted some time to settle in, get ready for grad school....and stuff.... But as I started looking at some jobs up here, I thought I should apply anyway. I ended up getting accepted for a position in PSR (psychosocial rehabilitation). You work with youth and adults with severe mental issues and disabilities to teach them social skills. So Monday I went to my first day and had this AWFUL feeling. The job had sounded too good to be true, and it turns out.... it was. Dirty, nast building. Dirty, nasty co-workers. It just felt so wrong.

But here's another testament to the answering of prayers. Another door was opened. I had decided on a whim to take another interview at the Juvenile Court up here. My last position had me pretty burned out, but this position was working with their clinical department in program coordination... basically, not having to deal with snot-faced parents or their piggy headed kids in person. They called me Monday, right in the middle of my other job, and begged me to start the position. I was going to tell them no because it's full time, but after much prayer and deliberation... I KNOW it's where I need to be.

It hopefully will help the transition a little more.... as I'm up here, not knowing where to go or anybody, and being a bum. Ah, a bum, my life's calling.

Memory Tag!!!

2008-08-04T10:56:00.000-07:00

Ok, I wasn't going to do this post because I have the biggest fear.... no one remembers anything about me. If anything, Becca might post about her concussion, so I thought it was worth a shot. It has been so fun to do this on other's blogs:

1. As a comment on my blog, leave one memory that you and I had together. It doesn't matter if you knew me a little or a lot, anything you remember!2. Next, re-post these instructions on your blog and see how many people leave a memory about you. It's actually pretty funny to see the responses. If you leave a memory about me, I'll assume you're playing the game and I'll come to your blog and leave one about you.

Splat.

2008-07-13T20:21:00.001-07:00

The other day I went grocery shopping. As I was walking back out to my car, I found it surrounded by two little kids and their mother.
"Mommy, why isn't that bird moving?"
"He's just resting."
"Why is he resting upside down?"
"Get in the car. Our ice cream will melt."
I walked up to the car to see the resting bird. There it was - somehow attached to the front of the light. It was so brigh t I thought it was a stuffed animal at first.I didn't dare just kick it off, right in front of the little boys, so I just pretended I hadn't noticed and drove off.
The poor dang bird survived the trip home. AND a trip to Jake's parents. AND a trip out to Tremonton at my parents. 3 days, this dead guy hung on. It's little leg was stuck under the light. And I didn't feel right about just ripping him off.
And then the head fell off. I'll spare you those pictures.
Just remember this when you have a bad day.

Birf-day, Shout HOORAY!!

2008-07-06T20:04:00.000-07:00

I know it was two weeks ago, but I really need to blog about my birthday. I have to be honest... I am not fond of getting old. Last year 25 was hard for me. Jake was out of the country and I turned half of fifty. But the thing about 26 is even worse..... the UPPER twenties. A scary place I've never been.But now that I have survived a few weeks in the 26's.... I am loving it. I had the best birthday EVER.
To help make up for last year, we had a week-long celebration. Girl's Camp was planned right in the middle of my birthday so Jake surprised me the Saturday morning before and went together with a bunch of friends and family to get me an X-Box. WAAHHH!!!! I did pee a little again.
He was so cute all that day. I got thoroughly spoiled and he even cooked ALL THREE meals. And would you believe it.... they were edible too.

I will be honest. I had mixed feelings about spending my birthday at Girl's Camp. But it turned out to be such a blessing. I love my girls and my ward. We had a blast and they taught me to feel young again :) They woke me up with a cake made out of ding-dongs, as they call me their favorite Ding Dong. The girls even wrote the following message with pine-cones.

Seriously, I LOVE THEM!!! Sniff!
That night when I returned home the birthday got even better. That was when got the news about the job!!
But the party doesn't end there. The next weekend Jake surprised me yet again. He invited some friends and family over for a par-tay. I never had them in high school or even in college. I was always afraid no one would show up. That's a different blog. But at the party I got even more surprised.... I got Guitar Hero. And Di came! Sniff again!! I can't believe all the work Jake went to. And I loved seeing everybody together. We had so much fun. I even got more granny-panties but Jake won't let me post those pictures.
Jennica looks JUST like a plastic surgery gone wrong in this picture, and Andrea's a little high, but you gotta love my fam! (Yeah, Dad still thinks he's a dinosaur....)

Here is everybody showing me how Guitar Hero is done. I was not good to start with, but after having it for two weeks..... my other day job is a rock star.

And once again, I have to profess my love for my Jakey. He always goes out of his way to make me feel loved and special, especially during the stressful times. I am one gol-darn lucky old lady!! I seriously too am so blessed to have all my friends and family! :) And especially to those of you that read my blog!!! (even if I force you!)

WHOOSH!!!

2008-07-02T10:04:00.000-07:00

Yeah, yeah, another month has gone by. And I don't even have pictures this time. BUT, it has been a whoosh of a month. That is the sound of happiness, stress, sadness, scariness, and farting. But for us it is a good thing.
We have had so many ups and downs this year, with work, the house, health, family, deaths, etc. A few months ago we kept having the feeling that things just didn't feel right anymore.... that we needed to get out and maybe look elsewhere. Those who know me realize that my current job has just about done me in. I have become a basketcase. When I see teenagers I literally start to convulse. We sat down right before Jake graduated and made the scary plans to look for jobs... far, far, far away. Just to see.
Well, we got one. Jake applied for a web designer position in Boise where his sister lives. We knew it was a long shot - it was an awesome position. One that would allow me to take time off to either work part time or go back and get my Master's. Too good to be true. Well, WE GOT IT!! Jake just went up yesterday and passed the polygraph portion of the hiring process. We just need to wait for the background check to go through and IT IS OURS. Since Jake doesn't have a fondness of murdering or drugs, I think we'll be OK.
It is such a mix of emotions. We really hate to leave the house and ward that we love. We have worked so hard on it, just to put it up for sale when it is done. We are sad to leave the wonderful friends and family here, and I will even miss certain parts about work. But it just FEELS SO RIGHT. We know that it is where we are supposed to go. Still Idaho, still potatoes, but so right.

So right now it is a mess. We are trying to get the house here ready and on the market while at the same time trying to buy a house up there. Moving is a scary, scary thing. And I can't even put in my two weeks yet... there's the stupid money and insurance factor. So it's about to be a start of a new life. Good thing?? Yeah, as long as it involves potatoes, I think so. Whoosh.

Fear Factor Ev Style

2008-06-03T19:52:00.000-07:00

I have determined that I have been quite the sap in recent postings. I really try to pretend after seeing other's blogs that I'm all cute and normal and exciting. Not the true story. I know, shocker. The fact is, I still wear a helmet to bed. I also have determined I like to take pictures with my nose up and my mouth open. See above.
But, I also like to take pictures with the head down, the double chin out, and the freakiness on. I thought I'd let everyone know that I may be getting really old, as I'm reminded by kids on a daily basis, but I can still throw down yo!! Below you will see me eating an octopus. We went to an Italian dinner with our friends in Little Italy. It was such a traumatic experience that it has taken me awhile to post about. I also have determined that I blog a lot about being old, and it doesn't help that I will enter the UPPER twenties this month. But as for the octopus and all it's danger, eat THAT, old people!!!

Yeah, Yo, this is awesome. I ate an octopus. How is that for a blog story?? Yes, I still need help!!!

I hate alarm clocks

2008-05-26T20:53:00.000-07:00

When the alarm goes off in the morning, I fight the urge to murder. It's a thing I hate. But with so much negativity around me, I thought I would take time today to write on a few more of my loves.
I love sleeping in, for one. It was a three-day weekend full of beautiful, beautiful things. And I love that.

I love my friends. I don't get to see them nearly as much as I want to but I love each one of them. I'm so grateful for all of you and for the changes you have made in my life. I can't believe that you put up with me!! I love the chance to blog and catch up with so many. I love that I get to be myself and not everyone will run away screaming.
A few months ago I went up to Kisty's cabin with a bunch of us and never posted. Poo on me!! But that's still a thing I love!!

And totally more sappy, I love my family. I love my way too insane but beautiful sisters. Becca, you're a favorite too. But I don't know about your neck. We try to keep her big neck a secret but it's pretty hard because she runs out of scarves. :)

And yes, I love Carrie even though she is going into hooker-ing. Or maybe cross-dresser-ing. (OK, it was a colorguard competition last month but I did see plenty of spandex so it made me wonder....)

Right now, I love that Jake is graduated. I love that when I come home, HE'S HOME TOO. I love the excitement that this new job search is bringing and the endless possibilities in front of us. Yes, I'm scared to death and peeing in my pants a little, but I love it. (not the peeing part though). The rumor is out - there's a good possibility we will have to leave this beautiful home we love and our wonderful friends and neighbors here, but it makes room for new experiences and friends and fun and.... . ok, that's too sappy, even for me.
I also love to torture people in many fun ways. I love to win wars with Jake in licking each other's faces. And he will admit, he cries himself to sleep at night because he's so gooey and wimpy that he can't fight back. I have so many loves and blessings in my life that I am overwhelmed. I was recently talking to a friend that gave me inspiration - to write at the end of each day the hand of the Lord in my life. It has started to go beyond squishy things, forts, and blankees for me. I'm in love with life and though it can really stink at times and has felt pretty dang hard recently, there is too much to love to stay focused on that!!!!!

He's a BIG boy now!!!

2008-05-21T12:33:00.000-07:00

I need to post and say how proud I am of my Jakey. He graduated with his BFA in Graphic Design from Utah State on May 4th (maybe more pictures later). It only took him a short 8 years (with a mission in between) and he made it.
In my life, I used to think I found a few true loves - pudding, forts, squishy things... until I met Jake. He put pudding to shame. I can honestly say he is my one and only true love!! I don't think there would ever be anyone quite so insane yet so perfect. I love this man.
I love him for his dimples, his patience, his ability to make the best out of the worst situations, the way he will clean up my bean-burrito puke without puking himself and even hold my hair back. I love him for his strong testimony and his ability to set the perfect example for me in the hardest of situations. I love him for his hyena laugh, his muscular dancing legs, and his bad-a Harley jacket, (even though he rides a Yamaha). I love the fact that we fell in love and he first kissed me when I was in a wheelchair --- (he knew I couldn't fight back). I love him for his ability for everyone around him to love him too, and to have 3 year old neighbor kids who think he's their best friend.
I truly feel that I am the luckiest woman in this WHOLE world. Sappy but oh so true. I truly am so grateful for Jake and the fact that I can be with him for forever. A lot has happened in this last month that has deepened my understanding of what this means and how truly blessed I am. I hope everyone can pull their loved ones aside and let them know what they mean too.

I heart New York!!!

2008-05-05T17:49:00.001-07:00

I swear, most days I feel like Jake needs to check me into a nursing home. Despite all numbers, I am senile.

I think the computer is upset and lonely .... I have been trying to upload photos for the BIG NYC trip and it is sure being fussy. Fussy old computer. So I am ending up uploading them one at a time and have lost all patience. So here are a few highlights!!

Like I mentioned before, we went with Jake's art history class from USU. It was the only way to ever afford a cheap enough trip to NYC. And despite the odds of all cheapness, we felt OH SO CLASSY the entire time!!

It was awesome. Jake's professor was a pretty cool guy and spent the entire time wasted (started at 11 a.m. on the plane, folks) so we pretty much got to do our own thing.

The night we flew in a group of us went to the Empire State building. Coming out, a guy in our group flagged down a limo driver and talked him into taking all 10 of us all around town at night for like ten bucks.

This is our CLASSY limo picture. I have never ridden in a limo!! It had pimp lights.

By the way, notice by beautiful, glowing orange hands. Needless to say I will not be re-visiting self tanner anytime in the near future.

We checked into our hotel which was beyond ghetto. We had a teensy little bathroom to share between eight rooms. The rest of the trip was like none other I've ever had to New York. (My mommy is from New Jersey so I've had a few trips in my life). We did hit the touristy stuff like Times Square, Staten Island, WTC, etc. but a lot of it was the true New Yo-ok (*that's how you have to say it to be classy like me) experience. Our hotel was in Greenwich village and so we lived the true villager life. Look at me contemplating on the deeper meanings of hot chocolate here.

One of the favorite things for me was getting to see two Broadway shows. We went to Hairspray one night and then Monty Python's Spamalot the next. I will forever, forever cherish the in-explicable experience of getting to see Clay Aiken in tights.

And yes, I had to stop and pick up my paycheck at the sight below.

A good rest of the portion of the trip was spent in Museums. The Met was so awesome. We also took the Subway to the top of the island and went toa place called the Cloisters which is one of the coolest things ever!!

And a few other picture-less highlights: we saw a real pimp, I got robbed (if you count leaving a bag of souvenirs on the ground and returning to find it gone), I rode the pole on the subway, had Pinkberry frozen yogurt and big fat pizza.... it was heaven.

Good place to visit but I still like my potato-driven life.

I confuse myself

2008-04-09T16:58:00.000-07:00

OK I seriously know I have mental issues. I'm insane. And I love it.... really, besides the drooling.

First thing first - Jake and I just got back from a trip (hey, he got credit for school so it's not TOTALLY a vacation) to NYC. That will be the next post, but I have some explaining to do in this one. The above photo is my favorite one from all of New York. This bull is well known and in the financial district. Jake and I decided to be obsene. There was even a group of cops standing right next to us, apalled that instead of grabbing this bull by the place where most people do, I got a litle creative. I don't care, I'm insane. And this describes how I feel most days when I got home from work!! Anyways....

I posted on the last blog that I had been to a training that made me become worried about my blog. The training was all about the dangers and advantages of technology and the internet. So basically I got all freaked out that I could get a blog stalker, logging in to see my full name, the small town I live in, that would show up at my door and want to cook me alive and make human meat pie. Besides, I work in a job where a lot of people are not happy and could want revenge. But then I started thinking... if they're really crazy to want that kind of pie, they could find me anyways. And I thought about the benefits of having an open blog. It's easier to re-connect and find people that I haven't talked to in way too long. That is starting to outweigh my fear. So I really appreciate you sending me your email addresses. I am saving them. I will try staying public for awhile and if I get all freaked out and insane again, about my stalker craving human meat pie, I will go private....

I will also leave with this promise!! I'm no longer going to be a blogging bum. I will update oh so much now. Well..... I guess I better not make promises that I can't keep. I don't even have time to explain why life is all flipside down right now.

Remember... I'm insane.

And I'm BACK

2008-04-01T09:14:00.000-07:00

It has been FOREVER. Life has really turned itself upside down and then over again, and a little bit sideways.
I have lots of pictures and stories, but I recently attending a securities training on some of potential dangers of blogs. I'm sure you've all heard the shhpealll (how in the heck do you spell that?) So I will be going private. I should have chosen that a long time ago, especially considering my stinkin profession, but it takes me awhile to catch on to some things.
There are a bunch of your blogs I love but don't have all your email addresses. Please send me a post if you want to be invited or hit me with an email : evster2000@hotmail.com
I hope you want to keep in touch!! Just gotta keep this booty under wraps, yo!! :)

We all need a Vacation!

2008-02-02T15:44:00.001-08:00

I've been sitting like an old lady in a rocker lately and reflecting on the things that make me happy in life. There are SO many and I too often forget my blessings.
I realized this week one thing that I will always live for is a VACATION. I love travelling - I love vacations - I love everything about it!! I like staying in all kinds of hotel rooms, from the Hilton to some scary super 8 where I know dead bodies hide. I love meeting the strange people and eating weird food and I love the long airpline rides or car trips. Jake and I have been so blessed in the three years we've been together to have some unforgettable vacations.

One of the most fun ones was pretty close to home when about 9 months ago we decided to just get away. We drove up past Boise and stayed at this little Victorian hotel and went water-rafting and hiking. Check me out in my hot wet suit. Rarrrr.

Yeah, I don't know that all albinos went out in the sun like me :)
This is in front of the hotel. This weird fish was sitting in the middle of the road. I think this made us laugh for several hours. The thing about Jake and I is that it doesn't take a lot to get entertained..
I know it looks like I'm pooping but I think I was just .... squatting?? (What's WRONG with me?)

Also this year we were fortunate enough to be asked to 'chaperone' Dad's choir trip to Southern California. I think Dad thought I would use my Probation officer skills to do some beating. No, it was a vacation and we weren't much of what you'd consider 'chaperones.' Jake got the kids cited in riots and even had a sugar-packet eating contest. I also tried to pimp out my little sister Carrie and embarrass her as often as I could. It was an awesome trip. We went through Vegas, Sea World, San Diego, and even stayed in the Embassy Suites. I hope he'll ask us to 'chaperone' again but the riots might have been a bad idea...

Me with Carrie. so cute!!! And date-able. She's 16!!

And of course I've already posted this but my favorite vacation of them all this year has been to Switzerland. It was so neat to spend a week in one of the most beautiful places I've ever been. I just want to say I'm grateful for America - for the food, the toilets, the non-spitting language.

We have a few more vacations planned for this year that I can't wait for. In March Jake and I will be heading to New York City for a week. We are going with USU with an art history class. I decided after spending three weeks alone last summer, I'm not letting Jake take any more trips without me :) We also are hoping to join Jake's family on a church history tour this summer and then take an Oregon Coast trip of our own in the fall.

I live for this!! And if anybody else out there likes a vacation, I urge you to consider Franklin Idaho and come see us. We have some of the biggest potatoes. And trees. There's some dirt too. :)

President Hinckley

2008-01-29T15:38:00.000-08:00

This was a hard weekend. I had just put my jammies on and got ready for bed when I decided to turn on the TV and found out about President Hinckley's passing. I admit I cried for quite some time. I know that so many others feel the same way - I felt like I had such a personal connection with our Prophet. I will never forget the first experience I had meeting him. Back in high school, with the Madrigal Choir, we would go down to Temple Square every year. My dad had arranged it so we would sing on the steps inside the Church Office Buildings. I remember we were in the middle of a song when this amazing feeling, an amazing Spirit, started welling up inside. Sooner than we knew it, most of the choir was crying because of that same Spirit. President Hinckley had entered the room and was standing there, listening to us. He spent the time to joke and talk with us and then left, but it left us shaking. And I remember feeling that exact same spirit every time I would hear him and see him speak at Conference. I truly have such a testimony that he was truly a man of God and called of Him to direct us. I am happy that he is with his wife, but what a loss. And I hope I will never, ever, EVER forget that same spirit that he always helped me to feel.

Yep, tagged again!

2008-01-27T13:43:00.000-08:00

As a pre-note, I am always so impressed by people's taggings. I totally stalk blogs and love tags to get to know people you THINK you know. It's been good to know all about people's feet and eating habits.... It's been awhile since I've responded to a tag. Di, I liked this one!! But you win in the funniness.

ABC's of you. Each player then tags 6 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know that they have been tagged and asking them to read your blog.
A- Attached or single: Attached. Almost siamese. I cannot sleep unless I have so much as a foot touching him.
B- Best Friend: As cheesy and corny as it is, it's my husband Jake. There has never been a person so as insane as me that understands me and my drooling so well.
C-Cake or Pie: If we're throwing them in someone's face, I'd say both. I won't eat either. As you can see from previous posts, cake and I have a troubled history. I would prefer not to talk about it.
D-Day of Choice: I wanted to say 'No Pants Friday' but that's already been taken. I will go with Tuesday. At 7.
E- Essential Item: My slippers. I cannot be at home and not having something fuzzy on my feet. What can I say? I like fuzzy!
F- Favorite Color: Green.... not the color of boogers or mold but sagey, pretty green.
G- Gummi Bears or Worms: Gotta go with worms. I like squishy things along with fuzzy things.
H- Hometown: Tremonton Utah!!!
I- Indulgence(s): A good snuggle, popsicles, chocolate covered cinnamon bears, playing Killer Bunnies, and being a rap-star.
J- January or July: I still choose Tuesday. At 7. I don't like either of these months. I like spring and fall!
K-Kids: I spend all my time taking care of my little 26 year old Jake.
L-Life is incomplete without: Game and date nights with my Jake, Grey's Anatomy, calls to my friends to see if THEY'VE seen Grey's Anatomy, a good book with a fuzzy blanket, and sugar.
M- Marriage Date: December 1, 2004.
N- Number of Siblings: 6 beautiful, although clinically mentally ill sisters :) And seven in-laws.
O- Oranges or Apples: Totally, hands down in any contest, the big bad orange. They can squirt things - the apple just sits there.
P- Phobias or Fears: Heights, Jake dying, forgetting to wear pants in public.
Q- Quote(s): "I like waking up to the smell of bacon.... sue me" - Michael Scott
R- Reason To Smile: Jake and his dimples, puppies, my young women class.
S- Season: Fall... fat, fat fall.
T- Tag Three: Becca, Em, Camille
U- Unknown Fact About Me: Before I served in 'Nam...... oh, wait. Really, I once licked an octopus. Really.
V- Vegetarian or Oppressor of Animal: Dumbest question ever. Can I have some more ribs?
W- Worst Habit: Jake has started growing gray eyebrows and I will attack him to cut them out. He thinks this is abnormal. Everyone does this, I know.
X- X-Rays or Ultrasounds: I have a totally funny story. In December they did an ultrasound of my kidneys.... That day at lunch we had potatoes and turkey.... my belly was so full of gas they couldn't see the kidneys. I always thought gas was invisible. So I choose x-rays.
Y- Your Favorite Food: Pudding, halibut, and anything that makes my hips wider.
Yes, there's no Z. I make one up too, Di.
Zig-zag or zits: Close race, I'd go with zig zags.

Life in a Bathrobe

2008-01-24T10:57:00.000-08:00

Here are pictures of my new tiled kitchen that I love. Why am I posting these pictures now?? Because I'm in my fuzzy purple bathrobe. I never pegged myself as a bathrobe kind of girl... I used to think they were for hairy-legged, hairy-chinned, hair-netted old ladies. But not anymore. I love my bathrobe!! And I better get used to it because I am on a two week leave from work to heal from some complications I've had. So I am trying to use this time to admire my new tile and to think of my life. I have realized, as I sit here with anxiety about what is happening at the court without me, that I put too much into work and need to put more into me. Work is not what matters - I need to get back to life!! So I'm trying to enjoy my bathrobe days the best I can. And since I can't post pictures of myself, I'll post them of my kitchen. We tore out and built this kitchen from the ground up and I am pretty dang proud!!
This is the view from the office. Jake tiled the kitchen first and he let Rob & Brandon help. Somehow, they probably just got into mud-fights and belly scratching contests, because when it was done it looked like a 3 year old had tiled. We had to unfortunately tear it out and we hired Jake's friend Jason to come in. He did an amazing job. I love my floor, I could kiss it!
So there you have it - pictures I promised over two months ago. I guess bathrobe girls don't have too much else to take pictures of!! :)

Bad stinking day

2008-01-18T17:04:00.000-08:00

I have had a pooper scooper of a day. Seriously. And it has left me un-believably worked up and upset right before a what-should-be-good three day weekend.
Does anybody have any good tips on how to get rid of smelly, poopy stress???? Or maybe I'm beyond help. HELP!

Revenge - Eat THAT, you stupid cake!!

2008-01-17T18:37:00.000-08:00

I hope the past cake catastrophe is cleansed from everyone's mind. On December 30th, Jake had his 26th birthday... (yeah, geezer). I decided to plot my revenge of the last killer cake. Yes, this time I re-attacked the double layer, yellow cake, chocolate frosting. And I WON!! And get this = HOMEMADE FRIGGIN FROSTING!! I guess there's hope for me after all.
And yes, Jake still thinks he's five.

Glow in the Dark!!

2008-01-13T23:17:00.000-08:00

I am officially radioactive. Yeah, I'm freaky. And I totally hate it!!
I am literally sitting here at midnight, in my special bathrobe, with my special leopard slippers, with rubber gloves so I don't contaminate the computer. I have sat on special sheets on the couch since Friday and I tell you, I'm especially more than a little bit bored!! I guess being radioactive has some perks - when Jake pisses me off, I chase him with my freaky radioactive neck. :)
Really, it has been a long week. I got my first radioactive Iodine treatment Friday. Before that I was in the hospital for about a weeks worth of tests. I set a hospital record (I seriously feel it is such a great accomplishment!) for the most over-active thyroid they have seen. Yeah, I'm freaky.
Friday was the big, freaky day. They made me go into the middle of a sterile room with all those yellow scary signs that you see on monster cartoons. The radiation was in the form of liquid iodine that I had to drink out of a straw through a big lead cup. It is so funny because they were so worried about touching it, and I had to pay like a thousand dollars for a special transport vehicle to bring the stuff to the hospital, but yet they make me put it in my mouth.... Something's wrong with that!!
I have felt a bad sore throat and like I have the flu but it's totally not bad and I think I've seen worse....
So no glow-in-the-dark pictures today. Although, I did have a re-match with cake-baking and some pictures are soon to come!!!! Freaky.

Put some leaves on it!

2008-01-05T09:11:00.000-08:00

Wow! I know it's been forever since I've blogged. I cannot hardly believe we are already in 2008. This last year has flown by so fast....seriously, I guess that's a part of getting old. It all starts to go too fast! This last year has been one of many first, blessings, and trials. In a way I am excited to be able to start new in 2008.
An update on a few things.....
December 1st Jake and I celebrated our third anniversary. Even after three years, this guy gives me butterflies when I look at him and we're still in love.... I can't believe he hasn't gotten sick of me yet. Jake was wonderful for our anniversary and surprised me the week before. I have never ever been to a concert in my life and I have always wanted to go. He made me take the day off work and surprised me... drove me down to Provo to see Evanescence, one of my favorite bands. We were in the standing crowd about five or six feet from the front of the stage. What was awesome is with one of the opening bands (Julien K, formerly Orgy) I caught a drumstrick the drummer threw into the crowd. I totally didn't know what to wear so I tried to be as goth and scary as a white girl could get...

Then Jake booked us a suite at the Armstrong Mansion in Salt Lake for the night. I know... he doesn't come off as a romantic but he totally is my teddy bear!! It was beautiful and so much fun.

December was a wonderful month. I love this time of year, as I'm sure most everybody does. Life has been so hectic and stressful that I really made an effort to focus on the important things in life... I get so wrapped up in my job and my house and the selfish things... this year I really tried to make Christmas mean more. To focus on what the Savior has done for me, and for my family, and for my calling, and for the best husband that I have forever! For the most part it worked. We were blessed to be able to spend time with both sides of the family. And we win the prize for having the craziest families, I promise!! We were able to go down to Temple Square with the Heatons and Larsens, which I haven't done for several years. So beautiful!!

It has also been a time of a little trial. Life has been a little struggle ever since my accident four years ago but I've tried so hard to move past it, but my body doesn't seem to want to do the same. For years it seems every part of me on the inside has been slowly falling apart. A few months ago I was diagnosed with some new things, hypderthyroidism and possibly problematic kidneys, which I thought explained many of the hospitalizations and symptoms of things that I've had over the past two years. It didn't sound like that big of a deal at all. It has ended up becoming pretty serious - my heart was starting to have irregular rhythyms and I wasn't responding to the medications for the thyroid. I was given the choice of surgery or radiation. I elected for radiation... I mean, I think it will be pretty cool to be radioactive for a few days so I can have superpowers (I might turn into the HULK). It comes with certain prices - we won't be able to start a family for another year.... But after much prayer and debating I know that this probably is a blessing to go through this - it's another thing that is going to teach me patience, which I'm in so much need of. I get my first treatment next week.... I am just excited because I think after this is taken care of I can finally start to be healthy again. And skinny!!

So I am excited for this new year - I have so many resolutions and goals and plans for more happiness.... I just hope it lasts!!! :)

dust, dust, dust

2007-11-26T09:47:00.000-08:00

I know it's been forever since I've posted. And I don't have any pictures to upload today because I'm at work!!
Life has been complete and utter chaos. I'm sure it is the same for everybody, but I just whine a little more than everyone else. Over Thanksgiving break, we decided to have travertine tile put in the kitchen and our fireplace. I thought it would be a two days of a mess, but well worth it. The tile guy showed up Wednesday and worked until 1 a.m. clear until Sunday. Garbage, dust, mud, and more dust were everywhere. We had all our appliances in the middle of the living room. We have spent all week trying to avoid the house. I can't stand messes - especially those ones!! But I'm happy to say it's over and the stove will go back in the kitchen tonight. I've never felt so white trash as to have it in the living room. That's almost Nascar! :) j/k
The tile is beautiful and I will post pictures later. I just hope you all had a wonderful, RELAXING, CLEAN Thanksgiving!! I am grateful for the new tile, to say the least!

Once Upon a Time

2007-10-28T17:23:00.000-07:00

This weekend was FABULOUS. My dear sweet sister, who still seems like she's six to me, got married to the love of her lifetime, Jake Coleman (AKA, Jake #2 or the evil Jake). We had such a good time having the whole entire family together. It was a beautiful wedding and a gorgeous day. I am having problems uploading all the pictures I want to, but these are pretty good.

Here are the rest of us sisters waiting for Erica to come out of the Logan Temple after the ceremony. This is the FOURTH wedding, I can hardly believe it! I just hope it's a long time before the next one. Carrie - you're only sixteen!!

Instead of a reception, Erica had a wedding dinner at the Bluebird. I loved it!! It was so simple and so much fun. Did I mention a BUFFET??!! Here we are, starving, in our cute bridesmaid outfits.

Here is the happy couple!

Here we are, another happy couple. It's hard for me to take in all of this, especially that it was just about three years ago that Jake and I went through this. It was a good reminder of just how special these weddings are!!!

Petersen Parties!

2007-10-21T15:10:00.000-07:00

Yay Yay Sista Jay! This weekend was wonderful. On Friday, Jaylene came home from the Phillipines for Erica's wedding next week. She moved over there in May with her husband, who started up a Western Watts call center. We have all missed her very much. Becca and I went down to pick her up in Salt Lake. And as smart as we always are, we waited an hour in the wrong terminal. We had to sit next to two high school girls who were kissing and putting their hands where I just didn't want to see them.. The first thing Jaylene wanted to do was eat Mexican, so we all went out to lunch. She kept freaking out, seeing things like sidewalks and drinking fountains, and it made me realize how much I always take for granted!
Later that night, we all went to Becca's. I think I came from the mailman, after seeing her make this beautiful cake. Then my wonderful, good old friend Julie *Curtis* Lewis came over and gave me a much, much needed haircut. I have hated my haircuts since I was married and have been struggling with what to do. I cut it pretty short, but so far I really love it. Thank you genius Julie!
On Saturday, Erica went through the Logan Temple for her first time. I can't believe she is getting married next week. She is marrying a wonderful guy and we are really happy for her. It really took us awhile to get over it.... she's young and we're all protective older sisters, but we all know this was meant to be. Here are some pictures from dinner at Firehouse afterwards...
Erica and her Jake #2. At leastI have the original.
Me and my man. Can you see the haircut??
Here we are, the four old ones. I love my Petersen family and am so grateful and proud of all of them!!!

TAGGED!

2007-10-16T14:01:00.001-07:00

I've been tagged by a few people, so I figure I better do at least one. I didn't attach a picure this time, though.... the last one was scary enough.

NOW AND THEN

Favorite Clothes:
THEN - Oh, I loved clothes... I would die for anything Guess, Girbaud, or Hammer pants. I liked the tight, tight, TIGHT stretch pants that were tye-died. And I remember asking for a glittered speckle shirt with a matching belt for one of my birthdays. Let's not forget the BANGS - biggest friggin bangs in the school! We measured.
NOW - What I like to wear and what I actually wear are quite different. Because of my job, I find myself in dress pants and button up shirts or sweaters every day. When I'm not working, I just go with what's around.... I love my Big Stars, hoodies, and slippers.

Favorite TV Shows:
THEN - Oh, I miss these shows - Saved by the Bell, Punky Brewster, Charles in Charge, Boy Meets World, Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego, to mention a few. My mom only let us watch like 1/2 hour every day... I dedicated it to Saved By the Bell. Yes, everyone is jealous, because Zack is my boyfriend!
NOW - I'm completely addicted to Grey's Anatomy, and I never hear the end of it from Jake. I even dream about it :) I also like The Office, American Idol, Trading Spaces, and So You Think You Can Dance

Favorite Music:
THEN - Oh, my first tape ever was MC Hammer. Hamma time, da da da da da da!! I even made up dances. (My poor, poor mother never knew where I came from). I also liked the early alternative bands (Green Day, Weezer) that made me think I was cool.
NOW - My tastes haven't evolved TOO much. I still like Green Day, Incubus, Linkin Park, Snow Patrol, and even go as soft as Norah Jones. But I gotta be a LITTLE punk to keep up with Jake.

Favorite Food:
THEN - Oh, I was always a pig so it's hard to narrow it down. I was so fat I think my parents put me on a leash. I have always loved fruit from our gardens, and root beer. I drank so much root beer that now I HATE it. Same think with ham and sausage. Blech!
NOW - I LOVE fish, especially halibut. I love cheesecake, fresh pineapple, popsicles, and PUDDING. I even paint my face in it!

Fears:
THEN - I think most girls were afraid of the same thing I was - boys. :) I was also really afraid of being kidnapped, heights, and of ghosts. I still am. When I was dating Jake, we stayed at his parent's restored house..... I couldn't sleep the whole night because I knew the house was haunted.
NOW - Did I mention, ghosts?! I think a big fear is not having kids (seriously, I'm getting old) or not feeling like I succeed, but most of all is to lose my Jake.

Woop, there it is yo! Now I tag Julie and Di, and I want Jake to do it because his blog is so manly and boring....

Halloween Came Early

2007-10-08T18:03:00.000-07:00

So I woke up this morning, thinking it was going to be a perfect day. It is Columbus Day, and so I get the day off... one of the few perks for working for the State. When I looked in the bathroom mirror, I screamed. I think Jake beat me in my sleep.... my eye was bright red everywhere. It has gotten better as the day went on... so I hope I don't go blind! (I know, I need to wax the eyebrows...gross)

I'm only here for the food!

2007-10-07T18:49:00.001-07:00

You should all know that my mouth is one of the biggest on this earth. Part of that is that I love to eat... everything! One of these days the be-dunk-a-dunk will catch up with me, but what is life without food? It just seems odd with my inability to cook!
Every time I have an opportunity to get with friends, dinner is the thing we do. I LOVE going out to dinner. Maybe it's because we never went out growing up,... Last week I got together with Kisty, Kristen, and Carrie. I love these girls and I miss them!! It was so good to go back and think about what we did when we lived together and the craziness (tents, balloons, albino neighbors) that we had. I have honestly not been as happy as I am now, but there are things I do miss about still being in college and the fun I had. I have had so much fun with every new set of roommates and wouldn't trade the experiences for the world. I wish I did better at keeping in touch ... I love all of you!

Then the next day after that dinner, we got to have a conference down in Ogden for work. I stayed with Kristen the night before, then went over to the Marriott. I guess one of the only perks of the job is having these conferences, which can be pretty entertaining.... especially the sleep-overs in the hotels. The girls I work with and I went to Applebee's (same place as the night bef0re) and stayed up way past my bedtime!

Yeah, I'm in serious need of maturing... don't know if that will ever happen!!

Attack of the Killer Cake

2007-09-29T17:54:00.000-07:00

So, since I'm half of 50 now, I've been on this kick of trying to improve myself and learn new things. I've just been feeling so stuck in life lately that I want to do new things. First, I'm almost positive that I will be applying for the MSS program (Master's of Social Science)... if no baby comes. ( I know Jake is cringing if he reads this). Next, I want to learn German. Why German? Because they get to hock and spit a lot when they talk, and I LIKE it. And one new thing is also cooking. I've been blessed to have such a wonderful husband who does a lot of the cooking, and I've been spoiled. So far, in the almost three years we've been married, I have only cooked a total of like 10 different dishes. I usually don't even get home until after 7 so it makes it hard to want to make something complicated.So I made a goal to cook one new thing a week.

Last week, it was cake. I HATE cake, I've always hated it. Jake's favorite thing in the WORLD happens to be yellow cake with chocolate frosting (I just don't get it). It's so funny - on his birthday in the past, I've made him bake his OWN cake because I hate it so much. But I decided to try and be domestic and an actual wife, so this was my attempt. I even was adventurous and tried to make it TWO layers. I am blaming it on cold frosting. I know the good cooks of you out there are cringing (yes Di, I didn't learn).... The funny thing is that Jake ending up eating this mess.

Weekend Fun

2007-09-23T15:46:00.000-07:00

Lately the work-week has been so stressful we've been living for the weekends. It's nice to be able to sleep in and actually see each other than more in just passing, now that Jake's back in school (last year, people!). Jake and I pretty much go pretty mental and crazy when the weekend hits. I swear, we got more immature the longer we're together.

Here are some pics from this week...
Melissa and Jeff came up with their cutest Macie. We had a barbeque and I tried to not cause TOO much permanent damage to cute Macie. I think I scared her more than she's ever been. I have this weird thing where I have to growl at babies... Isn't she cute??

Then, later on this week, Jake's good friend Jordan left to go live in the Netherlands for a month. Netherlands? Yeah, he tells us they speak some weird language called Flemmish. Sounds like what happens with a cold, or when Jake wants to gross me out! Anyways, we went to dinner with Jordan and Jake's BFF Rob. I'm proud to say that I ate more than ALL the men.

Fam-Ramily

2007-09-13T10:20:00.000-07:00

So here's my beautiful family!!! Sometimes I wonder where I came from:) I LOVE these people. We've been so lucky that the older we've gotten, the better and closer we get. I have to admit it, I was a stubborn, pig-like, butt-headed teenager. (That's why I have to work with those kids now - payback). I like to think I've outgrown most of that in my old age now, although Jake probably won't agree with you. I can't believe that the majority of us will be married. Erica's hitching with her Jake number 2 next month!! Smooch!!

I need to post more often and get some more pictures up. The issue is that I do this at work where I don't have the pictures. The minute I get home the computer is the last thing I think of, with all there is to finish on our house. When I'm here at work, it's like an escape. Goodness knows I need a lot of those escapes. Speaking of the house, it is getting awesome. I want people to visit lonely us and come see it!! I'm so proud of us for once. I actually did stuff with power tools. Luv it!!

Wet and Wild

2007-09-07T08:50:00.000-07:00

So recently Jake and I took a white-water rafting trip up past Boise on the Payette River. Yeah, we're all cool and wid it yo!! The look on my face is not planned (on the front right, with my mouth WIDE OPEN). Everyone always gives me such a hard time for being a spaz. I know I am, but this look proves it is natural.... I didn't even know a picture was being taken, and that's how I look. I thought we were going to die the whole time, but it was awesome. So much better than the Snake River. I have such a big mouth!!

It was absolutely amazing. We decided just to take a little trip to spend time together before Jake left for school this summer, and we spent the days sleeping in and eating what we wanted to. The bad thing about vacations is that they make me want to vacation EVEN MORE!!

Now I'm here at work, which is SOOOO busy since school started again. The summers slow down when all these freaky deaky teenagers aren't congregated, but now they're back to getting in trouble. I'm seeing everything from public mooning to beating people up with baseball bats!! Yeah, I'm not ever going to be ready to have my own!! :)

So hopefully it will be a relaxing weekend, which we haven't had in awhile. Jake has worked his way up to having his panel truck in the Peach Day's car show. He's been working on it since High school, and I'm so proud of him!! I will hopefully add pictures soon!

Nooget

2007-09-02T14:06:00.001-07:00

It's a slow Sunday, and I can't believe I'm posting again so soon! I woke up with one of my famous freak headaches..... and have been lying around like a sack all day. Yes, a sack!

I thought I would add some pictures of my recent trip to Switzerland with Jake, since I haven't shown them off yet. Jake's blog has so many more, but these are random ones. It was seriously a dream come true to go, and a week wasn't nearly enough time. Really soon, when we're so rich that we will use the money as toilet paper, I think we will do this stuff SO much more. I loved it all, except the food. They had a lot of pig.... and the cheese tasted like stale, dead, reesty underwear... I was grateful to come home for turkey sandwiches! You will notice that I look like crap the whole time - they lost my luggage and I went without make-up, a blowdryer, and I even wore my husband's deodorant!! It was awesome... and a little smelly.

This first picture is the first place we went when I flew into Zurich. It was in a quaint little town, and was the top of a cathedral that was hand-carved and painted.
The third day we went to Zermatt, which is right next to Italy. The Matterhorn is behind me. The day we came, it was POURING rain (try that with no coat and a hoodie), but this next morning, the sun came out so clearly. It was gorgeous.
This is from the Rheinfalls on the Switzerland/Germany border. Seriously, one of the most amazing things I've seen. There's a boat you can ride that will take you in the middle of the falls so you can touch them.
Here are Jake and I at the FLUGHAFEN (airport) in Zurich. Yes, I'm wearing poops.
This picture was taken on the day before we left in Lucerne, which was one of the prettiest cities in all Switzerland.
There you have it. I'm tallying up the country list - 7 so far! By far, Switzerland has been my favorite.

Tuxedo T-shirt

2007-09-01T21:54:00.001-07:00

I
AM
JAKE.

I
AM
THE
HUSBAND.

SHE
LOVES
ME.

I
LOVE
HER.

- Jake

Wienerschnitzel??

2007-09-01T21:03:00.000-07:00

So I gave in = finally started a blog, like all these young kids are talking about.... Sure don't know quite what I'm doing in my old age.
So here I am! Finally an Idaho resident, as was always my dream, to be among the potatoes and the lottery tickets. I have my sweet Jake with me and we couldn't be more happy. Again, in our aching old age, we are looking for new things to do and maybe blogging will be where it's AT, yo!! And by the way, I am lonely. Please visit.

*Evorama*